more one liners...

[Jemisa]

My neighbour knocked on my door at 2:30am this morning, can you believe that?! 2:30am....Luckily for him I was still up playing my Bagpipes.

Paddy says "Mick, I'm thinking of buying a Labrador".
"Fukc that" says Mick, "have you seen how many of their owners go blind?"

Man calls 999 and says "I think my wife is dead".The operator says how do you know? He says "The sex is the same but the ironing is building up!

I was in bed with a blind girl last night and she said that I had the biggest penis she had ever laid her hands on.I said "You're pulling my leg"

I've just had a letter back from Screwfix.They said they regretted to inform me that they're not actually a dating agency.

jem

[wildwood]

Love it. Well up to your usual standard Jem.