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A Few Smiles For A Dreery Day...

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Jemisa | 10:42 Thu 24th Jan 2013 | Jokes
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Went out last night and got really wasted. I woke up in the middle of the night next to some bloke who was snoring and farting, so I knew I made it home OK!


The wife's back on the warpath again. She was up for making a sex movie last night, and all I did was suggest we should hold auditions for her part.


I've accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles. My next crap could spell disaster.


My sister-in-law sat on my glasses and broke them. It was my own fault. I should have taken them off.

I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night, or "foreplay" as she likes to call it.

After both suffering from depression for a while, me and the wife were going to commit suicide yesterday. But strangely enough, once she killed herself, I started to feel a lot better. So I thought, flump it, soldier on!

I woke up this morning at 8, and could feel something was wrong. I got downstairs and found the wife face down on the kitchen floor, not breathing! I panicked. I didn't know what to do. Then I remembered McDonald's serves breakfast until 11:30.
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Ha ha ha Jem, wherever do you get them. Always love your jokes
15:12 Thu 24th Jan 2013
good ones, as usual, Jem
Ha ha ha Jem, wherever do you get them. Always love your jokes
lol
lol great jokes
Love the scrabble tiles one.
Tee hee all good ones there.
Good ones jem lol :-)
Question Author
Maggie you are my BA here. x

jem

(PS> I can't tell you that coz I'd have to kill you if I did) :)
Just keep then coming Jem.
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