What Instrument Do You Play?

[marval]

A man is walking around the streets of the city one day when he spies an old friend of his from college.

"George!" he yells. "I haven't seen you in ages! How have you been?"

"Well," George replies. "I am the Clarinet player for the International Orchestra."

"Spectacular!" the man replies.

"It is not what you might think, my friend. We play for the king of England, he loves the music. He says 'Fill the instruments with gold!' and they fill the Tuba with gold and they fill the Saxophone with gold, and me with the flaming Clarinet."

"We play for the queen of France. She loves the music; she says 'Fill the instruments with silver!' and they fill the Tuba with silver and they fill the Saxophone with silver, and me with the flaming Clarinet."

"Then we play for the czar of Russia. He hates the music; he says "Shove the instruments up their a$$e$!" and the tuba doesn't fit and the Saxophone doesn't fit. And me with the flaming Clarinet!"

[excelsior-1]

i saw a man with a rubber trumpet - he claimed to be looking for an elastic band

[frugalfred]

Does that cause colonic irritation?

[maggiebee]

Ouch!!