Neighbour Troubles!!

[escapologist]

Hi there, a young girl has just moved into my complex, and she's causing me a bit of trouble! I feel a bit mean because I think she's got mild learning difficulties but she just won't leave me alone! She knocks on the door to ask for silly things like the time, a pen? And I've tried ignoring her but she still does it, sometimes early hours of the morning. I even said to her that she can't be knocking on my door all the time but nothing works! Every time I go out/come in she rushes to meet me in the hall but she just stands there. She watches out the window for when I come home from work and just recently she's started taking my post so she has an excuse to knock on the door. I don't know how to deal with it as it's obvious she has some difficulties but she's living on her own and I just want to keep myself to myself! Any advice is appreciated

[carrust]

Has she got a social worker? If so, I'd have a chat with him/her about your problem. I'd also make sure you don't ask her in to your house for obvious reasons.

[Old_Geezer]

An unusual problem for an escapologist to have.

Can you not simply be polite but unencouraging ? You can be forthright if she is visiting too much, say you live your own life and have limited time to help/socialise. And be firm about early hours of the morning.

If you have already tried everything I'm unsure what other folk can add, but I like Carrust's thought that maybe, if she does have issues, she may already have a care worker popping in to help out, who you may be able to discuss this with.

[bookbinder]

It may be worthwhile to ask at your local town hall, or wherever the social workers are based, to see if the staff there know about the girl. If she is known to them, they might be able to discourage her attentions.

[Purple_Popple]

Can't you just ignore the knocking - have you got a spy hole in your font door so you can see who it is and if it is her don't answer. If you don't answer she may give up ?

[FrogNog]

Divebuddy, while I agree that help should be sought, I'm not sure the police are the most appropriate avenue.
If she has difficulties, this may make her more anxious.
Try social services, as she may already be in their care.
Good luck.

[FrogNog]

I take your point Divebuddy. The risk is they'll just treat it like a nuisance and that's probably not the best approach.
As you say, lay the vulnerability of the girl on with a trowel. She needs help not censure.

[TWR]

Dive, that is the last resort, the person might have police History & this would give her more reasons to go & knock on ES door, ES, I would ask her in when she brings your post, offer a Brew then explain that you have a very Strenuous & demanding job & needs your full attention, all this person want's is company & someone to talk to even for 10 mins, that may work wonders, If not, just ask her does she have a Social Worker & see if you can get her Tel No, But in a Nice sort of way.

[TWR]

Been & done there and done the Job Dive, all the person is doing is looking for a friend, but a friend at a distance of course.

[Prudie]

TWR although I believe you have a heart of gold I wouldn't dream of suggesting OP invites her in - what do you mean by young escapologist?

[TWR]

ES Is a Female Dive.

[Gavmacp]

Maybe, when you have a little time. Knock at her door and give her a little time. What generally happens with learning disability people is they are stuck in a flat but no one helps them access the community.

[TWR]

To add Dive, we had a Downs lady that had this Issue, but when explained it help the Service User to understand, the person as said may have Mild L.D. If she was any worse she would not be on her own, the persons I cared for "What was Termed, 4 To 1 o with is lad I had, 5.1, he was a handful.

[TWR]

It's surprising what a 10 mins chat does Prudie, & Thank you. x

[FrogNog]

I agree that inviting her into your home is not a good idea. I think she may become even more persistent if you did that.
Maybe she is lonely, however we don't all have the time or social skills to accommodate someone if their care and family are failing. It's not your responsibility escapologist and I think you are handling it well already.
I still think that social services and your local mental health authority are the best routes. The police at an outside push, but I don't trust them to handle it well.

[corylus]

She probably thinks that she's just being kind and friendly but is too OTT about it. Is she doing this because she's asking for help I wonder?