I Often

[marval]

I often say to myself, "I can't believe that cloning machine worked!"

I went to the museum and saw a Van Gogh painting. Underneath it said "Loaned anonymously."
I went to the front desk and said, "I’d like my Van Gogh back now, please."

What do you get if you cross a mountain and a desert?
Tired feet.

I once had my arm in a cast, but I'm not here to reminisce about my days in musical theatre.

A mute incontinent. Goes without saying

My friend was a pro at Russian Roulette- he only lost once.

If partially sighted people want the right to drive combine harvesters, I'm not going to stand in their way.

Due to heavy rainfall last night, there is now a leek in my Greenhouse.

I once sat and listened to the darkness for a whole hour. Then I thought "Hmm, maybe I should put some music on."

What did the Danish bricklayer say when someone tried to grab him?
Lego!

[Chipchopper]

That was my Van Gogh. It cost me an arm and an ear!

[janbee]

:-)

[Canary42]

I love the Van Gogh one :-D