I Sold

marval | 22:49 Sun 11th Mar 2018 | Jokes

5 Answers

I sold my car in the local newspaper today. The man that bought it spent three hours unwrapping it.

As a therapist, I have found that the most difficult patients are magicians. They never reveal their secrets.

I wonder what the Cambridge University Netball Team shorten their name to.

I was invited to play golf by some mates yesterday. Having never played before, they said I would need to buy a club. It’ll be the last time I play though. The shots were very awkward to play, and by the 5th, it kept sliding out of my hand as the chocolate melted.

I am getting a bit sick of eating boiled eggs with soldiers every morning. I can’t wait to leave the Army.

A man was arrested for stealing the gold leaf off trophies, but was later released due to lack of evidence. He showed no sign of guilt.

My friend is a Ski instructor, he teaches people to eat yoghurts safely.

Since winning the lottery, the amount of people I have caught swimming across my moat at my castle to try and come and ask me for money has been unbelievable. I can’t believe the lengths some people will go to.

Had trouble getting into the front door of my local high street pharmacy the other day. I think I’m getting too big for my Boots.