New On The Job
David had recently been ordained as a fully fledged vicar and was posted as a curate to a city church.
He spent his first few weeks learning about the workings of of the Parish under the watchful eye of the established priest.
One day the senior cleric said to him, "David, I want you to take the service on Sunday morning. It will help you to become known to the congregation."
"I-I'm not sure I'm quite ready for this."
"Of course you are. I suggest for your first sermon you give the story of the loaves and fishes. That should be an easy introduction for you."
So the day came and he entered the pulpit. He cleared his throat.
"Jesus and his followers were travelling throughout the land and came across a group of travellers. He spoke to them and learned they hadn't eaten for days. He called for his disciples to feed them, but all they had was 5000 loaves and 2000 fishes. How could he manage with just that?"
He realised his mistake, turned red in the face and announced a hymn, before he fled from the pulpit, laughter ringing in his ears.
He was totally upset, but the old vicar said "Don't worry, we all make mistakes. Next week we'll try again!"
So the following week he entered the pulpit again and Told the same story.
".....And Jesus was faced with multitude and all he had to feed them was 5 loaves and 2 fishes. How could he do it?"
And a voice from the congregation shouted "With what he had left from last week!"