Doctor And Patient
A guy goes to the doctor because he keeps throwing up.
After they do a few test the doctor says, "you've got a very rare disease. You stomach will not accept any food".
The guy starts panicking and says, "well what am I going to do? I'll die if I don't eat".
The doctor says, "Now I know this is going to sound strange, but there is a guy in America with the same condition. He survives by poking food up his bum. Now don't fly off the handle, but I suggest you try it with some soft food".
A couple days later the guy arrives at the surgery. He paces around the waiting room until the receptionist say he can go in. When he gets into the doctors room he says, "Doc it's amazing. I can even taste the food". He says all this while pacing up and down the room.
The doctor says," for christ sakes man, will you take a seat".
He says, "I cant. I'm chewing a toffee"!!!