There's More

[Rondy]

A waiter places a warm cup in front of the gentleman. The gentleman takes a sip and spits it out.
He turns to the waiter and says, “Waiter! This coffee tastes like mud!”
The waiter, looking surprised, turns to the gentleman and says, “But, sir, you asked for fresh ground!”

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Last night l slept with the bedside light on,people may think that's weird, but it makes a lovely hat.

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I took uplaying rugby to meet women.
Nurses mostly.

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My camera keeps falling off my neck and does whatever it wants....... I think it's bit of a loose canon.

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Yesterday I told my wife that I had the body of a Greek god….. That’s when she told me Buddha was not Greek.

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I'm not saying I was an ugly child but my mum used to knit me balaclavas without a face hole.

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[Hopkirk]

A balaclava is the only hat that suits me, and that's only if I wear it backwards.

[dustypuss]

That when your doing a bank job 😂 

[Ken4155]

Rondy, i've heard you were so ugly as a child, your mum had to feed you with a catapult.

And, boy, did you smell. So smelly she had to tie a bone around your neck so the dog would play with you.

[Patsy33]

😆