What You Never Want To Hear From Your Girlfriend

[pedigreechum]

In the style of Mock The Week....

I'll start...

1. Is it in yet?

2. Do you mind if Stefan joins us in the bedroom?

3. This is my dad.....call him Shona

Give us your best....

[pedigreechum]

hhheeewwwwwww....hhhheeeeeeewwwwwww...hheewwwwww

PLOP!

aaaaaaaaaaahhhh!

[Jugglering]

But my last partner really loved the smell of B.O......

[weeal]

... we need to talk...

[radiogaga]

my ex boyfriend was 6foot 5 inches.

[cazzrob]

oh is that why they call you Justin?

[radiogaga]

im thinking about buying a rampant rabbit.......

[topogigo]

You can smell it as well?
I wondered why there were seagulls circling the house!

[nutgoneflake]

No tongues please, I only let the dog do that.

[chimney]

Oh ******, I forgot to book that appointment at the VD clinic

[chimney]

My name's Ian and I'm a post-op transsexual

[weeal]

"I'm just admiring your c**k, I really miss mine"

[tubeway]

" I have my own website, you will soon stop noticing those cameras"

[mibn2cweus]

Oh my God! You were amazing . . . What? You were adopted? Really! What a coincidence; I had to give my son up for adoption. He would be your age now . . .

[Reverandfunk]

Not as big as my last boyfriend - "Tiny"

[Pish]

Because I love you and you really seem to want a 3-some, I've asked my Nan to join us.