Mangled And Misheard

[Captain Spod]

I don't know if these are really malapropisms, but on another thread someone is talking about driving with 'undue care and attention'. This is one of my favourites together with 'mute point' and 'without further adieu'.
Any others to cheer up a snowy April(!) afternoon?

[chelle7272]

supposably

axed instead of asked

It bugs me when people say something is 'quite unique'

[sandyRoe]

A gambler I knew talked of the coop, P pronounced, that some trainer or other had pulled off.

[emmie]

or, at this moment in time. x

[jno]

'I could care less' shows Americans being ironic while the British are being painfully pedantic.

[emmie]

Americans very rarely do irony. Jon Stewart does, but he is a clever clogs.

[tenrec]

Artic instead of arctic.

[emmie]

i love the word unequivocal, don't say it in a hurry,

[Old_Geezer]

They may think they are jno, but common belief regarding American's understanding of irony seems vindicated if that is their idea of irony.

[boxtops]

My big bugbear - pacific instead of specific

[Sharingan]

The 'You've got another thing / think coming' argument got played out over and over again in our house. Each camp brought forward arguments and evidence to back up their version, but the official concensus is either is equally right / wrong, but I've never seen anyone who thinks their version is right agree with the other one. If you google it half the world is arguing about it lol.

[susanxx]

medicines can cause problems for some. Whilst working at the chemist I was regularly asked for an expectoriant or a bronical cough medicine. But I too sometimes got it wrong when I asked a woman who wanted an haemorroid preparation if she wanted suppointment or ossitaries!

[susanxx]

I don't know nothing! Whats that mean exactly?

[Wharton]

In an engineering firm I worked for as a lad, one supervisor threatened the apprentices with, "Do that again and I'll have you upstairs like a ton of bricks."

[cupid04]

shucks Wharton, I thought you were still a lad, lol!

[Wharton]

lol cupid pal. With my experience (old age) and your youthful (naive).....I think I'll leave it at that :-)

[Wharton]

Et tu Brute - translated as "And you, you brute" by a fellow pupil at my old school (he failed his Latin).

[FredPuli43]

A man rang me to ask " R . E. " my field for grazing. Now, I'd never written " re" any grazing, so this reading of "re" as R.E. must have been his own.

But if you want legal mistakes and mis-hearings, my favourite is my ex brother-in-law's "who buried my fido", later abbreviated by him to 'the dead dog rule', for "uberrimae fide" which means "in the utmost honesty or faith". (It's the insurance rule that the insured must declare everything affecting the risk whether asked for or not). And my brother-in-law not only qualified as a solicitor but got what he called "an extinction" (a distinction) in conveyancing. See? Latin is not essential in law (though using a few tags and phrases might impress clients and improve the fee)

[Wharton]

^I take it that you're happy he's your 'ex brother-in-law'

[FredPuli43]

No, Wharton, I get on very well with both my exes, and their brothers. But this one (brother of ex 1) has always impressed by his practical, no nonsense, approach to law at the real grass roots level. He must save his lay clients thousands. As you might guess, he was like that as a student, but secretely is, and was, a very good lawyer in academic terms.