1. Why is one of the children having an identity crisis? There are two possibilities. The 39, as the preamble tells us, points along a line where you find two sets of five letters that "form" [or could form] the names; in one case, two possible [girls'] names emerge; presumably this could be interpreted as an identity crisis. However, the boy's name is marked in Chambers as being "of uncertain meaning", so that could be it instead. The ambiguity of "form" is also regrettable, and presumably has led to all the talk about dogs legs, which seems to me to be unnecessary. Setters and checkers, whose job it is to entertain solvers and not to put unnecessary barriers in their way, should always be on the look out for such ambiguities. That doesn't mean that a puzzle should necessarily be easy, but it should in the end lead to an unambiguous solution. Here, improvements could easily have been recommended by the checker.
2. The problem at 33, StSylvia, presumably arises because you have entered the wrong variant spelling at 1 (more ambiguity). This will probably have given you the name of a famous American author, who was concerned about hair coloring, rather than the correct answer. Note that the variant spelling that is required at 1 is actually the most commonly used variant. It can also be found in Webster's Third International and other dictionaries, such as the Shorter OED, for those who don't have the Oxford Dictionary of English. It is also in the quotations and in another relevant definition in OED, but surprisingly it is not there as a variant spelling of the lemma.