Sadly, our dear matron , Mamyalynne will be absent tonight as she has been taken on holiday to Welshland. I am sure all Members will join with me in hoping that she enjoys her rest cure , oops, short holiday, very much.
Because of Mamya's absence we will be facing a dearth of snacks. We will have to make do with a few crisps and nuts until more Members turn up when the nut quota will doubtless increase.
In honour of Mamya, however, I have concocted tonight's signature tailcock, Matron's Mixture**.
All raffle prizes will be gratefully received, please leave them on the hall table.
Dear young Suezy, fingers in ears and avert your eyes please. To what is the world coming? Daisy, can you please help me to put this screen between Lady Alex and the young and impressionable?
Thank you for the assistance, Miss Ena - I fear that Miss Kate is unaware that I'm under strict instructions from m'lady to ensure that all the guests are adequately taken care of...