Good evening all to our beautifully refurbished club.
Members are asked to be careful of our new paintwork and it would be appreciated if all animals could be restrained, preferably within a handbag or portmanteau.
The whiff of paint will soon fade, meanwhile, we must sympathise with the Queen who has to suffer this olfactory discomfort all the time.
So far for the raffle we have:
2 paintbrushes (hardly stiff at all)
half a bottle of white spirit
2 rolls of masking tape
Good evening , Mamya. How lovely to see you again.
What a plethora of delights you have prepared for us..I hardly know where to start.
Perhaps a schooner of Scintilla* ?
Are you a fan of Heston of the blessed snail porridge ?
1 half broken pencil
1 sharpener sans blade
I chewed biro
2 sheets of paper
1 Lord Sugar computer, five wires and fuses missing.
1 Power Station generator, copper wire missing
1 tome of off-colour ripped up DTC poems
It is delightful to see you back, boxtops. You now you are always welcome here.
Keep the chicken restrained, though...new paint and scratchy chickens....