Mad Over Fifties Club

[nungate]

Good evening and Happy Easter to all members of the MOFC and, indeed we at the Towers would like to extend those greetings to all members of AB.
Igor is back on duty at the entrance waiting to collect for concealment all coats, cloaks, and broomsticks in his various crooks and nannies members should note that there is no guarantee that these items will be returned at the end of our revels, though they may eventually turn up at some point
Our Tailcock this evening is in keeping with the season and is the Chocabunny" our resident mixologist does like to keep things current.
The Hot Plate Special tonight will be a honey roasted gammon, with new potatoes and that perennial favourite, cabbage.................. Of course it would not be MOFC if we did not have those favourites, volly vonts, horses doovers and canopies, so beloved by MOFC members. On the pudding trolley tonight we have profiteroles, with chocolate sauce and vanilla ice cream.
Our entertainment tonight comes from the Minstrels how do they manage to keep on getting in? with their usual selection of madrigals,and toccattas, though, tonight they are promising to "mix" things up a little and toss in the odd fugue!
Down in the Ballroom, we have a brand new band, the Fidgeridoos, who are going to provide us with classic old songs played on didgeridoos ........ please, didgeridon't..................
As always our faciltities are open to all members, the indoor pool loves company and we have a selection of swimwear for members to put on for swimming, (please do not offend the indoor pool by skinny dipping, he doesn't like that sort of thing) Up on the topmost tower the bungee is waiting for the more daring members.... who in their right mind would bungee over a moat full of piranhas? Our well stocked library is waiting for members who might prefer a quieter sort of evening. I am happy to say that the Triffid in the conservatory has been fed and is most amenable to visitors (enjoy it while you can this mood will not last!) I am also pleased to say that later on this evening, Frank, (Igor's minion who has returned briefly from college) has organised a bonfire for members to toast marshmallows and sing camp fire songs (what is that place teaching him?)
Rest assured dear members we have a plethora of delights for you this evening.
Lastly, my apologies for our late start this evening, I was called away on an urgent piece of family business.

A warm welcome awaits all who dare enter these portals


carriages at midnight

[Psybbo]

Thank you both, I'm very thirsty, off to have a chat with the lovely Queenie

[tonyav]

Yes nungate, quit easy to see how he passed his exams so easily without the need to cramm.

[queenofmean]

Hiya Tony and all,

Chamber is done...although there is a box on the landing that I have a feeling is coming back in here until it can be removed along with the contents in the bath. hopefully tomorrow (must be super nice to Mr Nungate).

I think my toe is as good as its going to be i'm afraid. I think I'm going to have to have the side off but the podiatrist wants it done in a hospital surroundings so I can be monitored throughout. I think its the only option I have left now :( I blame them to be honest. If they hadn't left so long between appointments my nails would never have gotten into that state in the first place.

[tonyav]

So Queenie, will the nail have to be removed ?.

[Psybbo]

Queenie, that sounds serious, good luck

[nungate]

she's trying hard not to think about it - she doesn't really want anything done to her toe at all.

[DTCwordfan]

Ouch!

With that, another bucket please, Igor.......

[Igor61]

your bucket DT, sir

[tonyav]

I can understand that, nungate, however it ain't gonna be right until it's dealt with though is it.

[nungate]

it's what I keep telling her

[tonyav]

I'm sure she will see sense in the end, nungate.

[queenofmean]

they want the whole nail off...I don't its the sides or nothing at all! I will get my way if it kills me!

[Psybbo]

Dt, I've wasted a couple of hours trying to send you the cover of the Guardian Magazine today for a new avatar and failed miserably

[nungate]

Tony we are talking about Queenie here - see her last post! Just about sums her up!

[Psybbo]

Queenie. is it ingrown?

[DTCwordfan]

11 irregular stanzas on trimming toenails

the first Queenie nail flies off like a seed
a dark germ inside
and plants itself in the sleeping Towers grass
come May a full-grown toe
luscious and greening
brings grackles to the Castle wood

the second is a fractured minty rhyme
a plump little piggy going to market
disfigured by a fungal rash
even the piranha crosses the moat
to avoid him

about the third
the less said the better
a disappointment to the Nungate family

Tony wrote the fourth
a scimitar as from the Haggis Nights
sharp as the thing
that sets it free

five, Igorian
a chained buttleman
proud and fat

a Northern Irish Peg raised number six
home schooled she
argued a case
before the Scottish Supremes
regarding the rights of toes

seven was a sly serial toe murderer
the cutest of the bunch
motel owners remembered her
smiling
signing the boyfriend's cheque

eight ate, eccles-style
leather, loved one hundred
and fifty pound
running shoes

Number nein, Daisy the philosopher
famously said after all
what is a toenail?

the tenth Queenie nail
from the big right toe, a cruel flagship
shoots a sliver across the lake
the ice just off
the Tower geese lazy on Chubb rails
like amusement park rides

remember the girl who dragged herself
from the sea
(who can forget her)
where her Dad's issue roiled the water?
the lunatic seer of AB-Babylon
warned us against this one:
you, Queenie
the apocalypse of Nungate love

[nungate]

ingrown, infected, very friable, basically her toenail is rubbish! We were warned years ago by our chiropodist about her toenails - I've had to take her privately to foot people over the years as it's been very difficult to get NHS appointments for her

[queenofmean]

The nails at the sides are very brittle Sib, and they break off and get stuck and it becomes an issue...sometimes it has been just dead skin cells causing it. But if they take the side off that's fine with me but I agree with the podiatrist, I want it done in a hospital surrounding where I can be monitored.

[nungate]

an Odd Ode to a Toe DT - excellent!

[nungate]

Queenie, Teddy needs rescued!!!