It’s Christmas Eve! What Are We...
ChatterBank9 mins ago
I tried counting sheep to get to sleep last night.
I got to 500 then lost interest so went home from work and got into bed.
___
Some people thought my plan to design a building with a two-kilometer corridor would be a fleeting hobby, but I'm in it for the long hall...
___
The Grim Reaper came for me last night, and I beat him off with a vacuum cleaner. Talk about Dyson with death.
___
First trip booked for 2024. Off to Iceland in March…
If that goes well, probably looking at Asda in April and Tesco in May!
___
There was a husband and his wife sitting next to a drunk in a bar.
suddenly, the drunk stands up and yells, " ATTENTION ALL "and farts loudly.
The wife is extremely embarrassed, and the husband looks at the drunk and " excuse me, you just farted before my wife. "
the drunk replies, " i'm sorry, i didn't know it was her turn. "
___
Paddy and Mick find three hand grenades and decide to take them to the Police station.
Mick: "What if one explodes before we get there?"
Paddy:"We'll say we only found two!"
___
A guy just drove past me and threw a piece of cheddar cheese at me
I thought to myself, “That’s mature”
___
No best answer has yet been selected by Rondy. Once a best answer has been selected, it will be shown here.
For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.