ChatterBank4 mins ago
Enough is enough
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Met a guy 8 weeks ago, really like him, travels alot with his job, trying to build a relationship with him, but travelling and his job are getting in the way a bit, I have given him space and all that jazz and making excuses for him for why he hasnt/cannot text me like he must be tired, busy, no signal etc, and Im lucky if I get a text back in return for any I may have sent (and I dont send many etiher as i feel guilty for disturbing him), he says he loves me, has spoken about marriage etc, keeps hoping to come home for the weekend so we can see each other, but I have not been heavy on him and have taken a back seat now, but I must admit I am getting rather frustrated at the lack of contact - I feel he could make more of an effort if he feels the way he says he does, I have not put any pressure on him at all, but I am rapidly losing the will to live with this one, am I expecting too much do you think, any texts from him are very basic and uninteresting no matter what questions I ask about him in general, life the universe Ihe just never answers them directly - I dont know where to go with this one. A small text to say he is missing me only takes a moment to write and send surely? I have even withheld contact with him for 3 days which didnt make any difference.
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For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.No he isnt married, but the weekend just gone he couldnt stop texting and we had a really good text 'chat', which was great, but there is just no consistency, I too thought there would be a honeymoon period but he is indeed the most dreadful 'cold fish', the time we have spent together has been so nice, really nice, and he is very tactile when we are in each others company, maybe he just doesnt find it easy saying these things everyday via text etc, there I go making yet another excuse for his erratic behaviour. Everone has told me to give him a break as he is just plain busy with his work which makes me feel I am asking too much here when Im not really.
Doh, life is sooo complicated.
Doh, life is sooo complicated.
What is even more frustrating is he text things like 'Do you believe we are meant to be together?' and 'I hope I can add something to your life' and when I have questioned some things he has said like 'I do miss you though' and 'I once wanted to say I love you but held off' - he replied that he meant everyword, do you think he blongs to a cult?
roughquest, think your doing right by holding off, sounds like he does like you but only when he's in the right mood, sorry it might be me being overly cynical afterall it has only been eight weeks, think your friends are right when they say give it time. good luck xx
ps. do you actually want to be with him really?
ps. do you actually want to be with him really?
Hi RQ ~ you've only known him 8 weeks and he's talking about getting married? Then he can't be bothered to even phone you, he's texting you instead. What does he do for a job RQ, is he a secret agent or something?
Sorry if this is going to upset you, but this is a bloke's view. It sounds as if he is playing you off against someone else ~ who will do the most running around after him etc. How can he talk about marriage, life long commiment and a loving relationship if he isn't bothered by not hearing from you for 3 days?
Two words spring to mind ~ Alarm Bells!!!!
Sorry if this is going to upset you, but this is a bloke's view. It sounds as if he is playing you off against someone else ~ who will do the most running around after him etc. How can he talk about marriage, life long commiment and a loving relationship if he isn't bothered by not hearing from you for 3 days?
Two words spring to mind ~ Alarm Bells!!!!
Thanks Samuel, he is a very reserved person and I do genuinely like him very much, he is a different person when we are together, he really is, I know his job is very stressful for him and the other night when he phoned he DID say to me he hates all the travelling and it wasnt what he had signed up for when he took the job on. Weather he is playing me off against someone else I cant say, but Im not chasing him, never have and never will. If he thinks Im worth it then let him come to my doorstep, forget all this playing games rubbish I really cant be bothered with it to be honest.