Happy Birthday mrs o, couldn't you properly kill the plant, save it il Christmas, then send her the plant with a big red bow tied through the stalk ;-))
My heavily Catholic mother once booked my (Jewish) wife in with a Christian course as a 'Christmas' present. I thought she'd taken it quite well, however when it was her birthday my wife gave her a funeral plan.
i gave my father in law a bottle of scotch for christmas, the following year he gave it back, so just for spite i drank it. its the thought that counts.lol