Crosswords1 min ago
Pension Sex - 2
WEDDING ANNIVERSARY SEX
A husband and his wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary, the husband yelled, 'When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads:
'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever'.'
'Yeah,' she replied, 'when you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads:
'Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last.' '
WOMEN'S HUMOROUS SEX
My husband came home with a tube of KY jelly and said, 'This will make you happy tonight.'
He was right. When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it all over the doorknobs & he couldn't get back in.
ELDERLY SEX
One night, an 87 year-old woman came home from Bingo and found her 92 year-old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor, assisted living apartment, killing him instantly.
Brought before the court on the charge of murder. The judge asked her if she had anything to say in her defense.
She began coolly, 'Yes, your honor. I worked out that at 92, if he could have sex... he could also fly.'
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A husband and his wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary, the husband yelled, 'When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads:
'Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever'.'
'Yeah,' she replied, 'when you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads:
'Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last.' '
WOMEN'S HUMOROUS SEX
My husband came home with a tube of KY jelly and said, 'This will make you happy tonight.'
He was right. When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it all over the doorknobs & he couldn't get back in.
ELDERLY SEX
One night, an 87 year-old woman came home from Bingo and found her 92 year-old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor, assisted living apartment, killing him instantly.
Brought before the court on the charge of murder. The judge asked her if she had anything to say in her defense.
She began coolly, 'Yes, your honor. I worked out that at 92, if he could have sex... he could also fly.'
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~