Anniversary
Things you SOULDN'T say on your anniversary:
10. I stopped caring about anniversaries when you stopped caring about your appearance.
9. Today is our what?
8. Okay, let's celebrate, but do we have to celebrate together?
7. I thought we only celebrated important events?
6. You can celebrate anniversaries with your next husband.
5. You don't like what I buy you, so I thought why bother.
4. I got you a present worth a quid for every time you were nice to me this year. Here's a £5 gift certificate for McDonald's.
3. If you want me to pretend like I care about our anniversary, I will.
2. You want to go out to dinner? Okay, okay, go on then.
1. I thought you only had to celebrate anniversaries while you were still in love.