christening a baby

[bednobs]

i am writing this here cause i'm not brave enough to post in r&s!
My husband would like our daughter christened in our local village church. On investigating the website it says that the godparents must hhave been baptised themselves (which i suppose makes sense) One of the people who we would like as a godparent, and would trust p's moral guidance to has not been christened themselves (and in fact as far as i know doesn't believe in god)
Do you reckon there is any way round this with the church? i want to get ideas before i put it to them.
I realise how ridiculous it sounds, wanting a godparent that doesn't believe in god, but i would like this person to have some sort of status in her life, other than "mum's friend"
Any ideas (that don't involve lambasting me for being hypocritcal)?

[VHG]

I dont believe in a god, but try to live a very moral life.

The pope's butler, who I assume DOES believe in god, has just been sentenced to 18 months in prison for stealing confidential documents.

Believing in god does not always mean a person is moral, in fact in histroy many people who claimed to believe in god have proven to be very UN-moral, like many catholic priests.

p.s. I am also very much against people who never set foot in church having their child christened just so they can have a family party (I am not saying this is the case in your family).

[bednobs]

lol vhg, it isn't like that really, Personally i don't believe in all that god mumbo jumbo but this is important to mr bednobs. We probably attend the church 2-3 times a year (for the memorial service, for the "return to church" day and usually one other)

[craft1948]

Sorry bednobs I don't see the point in having a god-parent who doesn't believe in God. Aren't god-parents supposed to make a religious promise as part of the service?

[EcclesCake]

Moral Guardian is an often used term.

The view of the church will be purely down to the views of the minister. Some are more open minded than others.

You really need to talk the minister at you local church.

[sherrardk]

I am totally hypocrytical and wish we had got our children christened (though I don't know why) but the eldest is too old now (the embarrassment factor would be too high) and I don't have enough people I would like to be godparents. My brother recently had his daughter christened in a Catholic church and we (his sisters) are godparents even though we aren't Catholic (though neither is he) and his wife's siblings are, I suspect, the proper godparents as they are Catholic. Don't know if this helps. PS - your daughter, your choice, x

[bednobs]

however, i WAS christened. I suppose there i
is a slight extra dimension because the same reverend conducted the funeral services of both our other children, and somehow i would really like something that ties all three of them together (obv not a funeral service for p) so mr b would like her to christen p

[craft1948]

I had my daughter christened when she was 3 months old (her father chose not to attend) in case she decided to be a Christian and so avoid the embarrassment of a late christening. Sadly, for me, she chose not to be a practising Christian but at least I gave her the choice.

[naomi24]

//On investigating the website it says that the godparents must hhave been baptised themselves //

Does baptism make someone a better person? According to your choice, clearly not. If I were you, I'd come clean and speak to my local minister. If he says 'no', then so be it. Make other arrangements to ensure the person of your choice has some influence in your child's life.

ps. As far as R&S is concerned, don’t listen to silly gossip. Most of us aren't spiteful and will help if we can.

[EcclesCake]

I was wrong with what I said (blanket reference to the church) but individual ministers often find back doors to assist in this kind of scenaio.

[craft1948]

Really Naomi!! I would have thought that if anyone posted in R&S about having their child christened they would have been made to look foolish....

[EDDIE51]

No way round it , God parents MUST be baptised and prepared to swear in church that they do believe in God and will 'Bring the child to Christ'
Otherwise there would be no point in having a baptism . Belief in Christ as savior and the determination to raise the child in that belief is fundamental to baptism.
( stands by and awaits Naomi's wrath )

[LoftyLottie]

Bednobs, my son wasn't Christened. We are not a religious family. But I asked my favourite and well loved cousin if I could name her as guardian in my will should anything happen to myself of Mr LL whilst he was under 18 and explained that it would give me great comfort to do this because of our strong relationship. Could you do something like this so that the lady concerned realised how special she is to you.

If this lady doesn't believe in God then she probably would feel very uncomfortable with having to make false declarations in a Church. I have been asked on several occasions to be a God parent but have declined. It was very nice to be asked though.

Difficult situation if your husband wants your daughter to be christened though.

[bednobs]

we already have changed our wills and named a guardian and trustees

[craft1948]

Lottie I hoped to be godmother to my then, best friend's son. Her husband then told me that they had considered me as godmother but decided to have this married couple, who were his friends, as they had more money than me (and no children to leave it to)................

[craft1948]

Naomi going by your last paragraph I'm clearly not............

[LoftyLottie]

How about just asking her if she will take on a duties of a special 'aunty' to your daughter - is a ceremony really necessary? Have your own special day for your daughter to welcome her into the world. She can then choose for herself what path she wants to take in life. Morality has nothing to do with religion.

[237SJ]

Speak to the vicar. They can be quite understanding sometimes. They can be quite understanding sometimes.

[237SJ]

Sorry, I didn`t mean to repeat myself!