Older Dating

[Firefly-823]

How do I tell my mom that I (a 17 year old) is dating a 22 year old man? I truly believe that he is the one and don't want to keep hiding it from my family, I really need advice!!!

Also how do you guys feel about it? Are there any parents out there that are for or against it and why?

[hereIam]

I personally do not think that is too big a gap.

[murraymints]

why would 5 years be a problem ?? no big Deal..

[andy-hughes]

As a dad to three daughters, I have always made it my business to be respectful and polite to all my daughters' boyfriends from first meeting onwards.

As time has shown, with the passing of time, those boyfriends have become husbands - and you never know which one it might be, so your children deserve the respect for their choices of partners, and I have always gone with that.

So introduce your boyfriend - you are only dating, not planning to elope!

Parents accept that their children are growing up, and dating is part of that process.

Good luck.

[MallyJ]

I don't know you or your boyfriend therefore I have no idea how he treats you, whether he is mature or immature, whether you are old or young for your years and so many other aspects of a relationship that would help me make a judgement. Your mother does know those things about you so I would just sit her down and tell her that there is someone new in your life and he is important to you and then arrange for them to meet. If he is not up for this I would be a tad concerned about him and would suggest he is not the one for you...hopefully your mum will love him too and be relieved that you both are approaching this relationship with maturity.

[Cloverjo]

I agree with everyone so far. It's not that big an age gap. You are not a child.

Just introduce him when he comes around to your house.

I wish my dad had been as polite to my boyfriends as Andy-Hughes was/is to his daughters' boyfriends. My dad used to the answer the door with a frown and "not another one, grr," and walk off. (He was joking...kind of)

[Firefly-823]

How do I even start the conversation thought?

[Gizmonster]

I met my missus when she was 18 and I was 24.
Over 26 years later and we're still together.
Good luck for the future :)

[murraymints]

take him home or have him pick you up from home without saying anything about age if it worries you..tell them after they have met

[Firefly-823]

How many of you guys are parents and would let your 17 year old daughter date an older man?

[murraymints]

I was 21 years younger than my husband !!

[donny48]

No problem. At 16yrs they got a key to the door and informed that they could have anyone to stay over just be careful.

[Firefly-823]

When did you guys start dating? @murraymints

[pixie374]

I wouldn't even call that "older". Why are they likely to object?

[Heaton]

My wife is almost 12 years younger than me so I mentioned this to her parents when we decided to get married. They had no objections and as it turned out, we are both settled and very happy after 28 years.

[murraymints]

I was 20 he was 41

[grasscarp]

Firefly the majority of women are dating men that are older than they are. When we met I was 25 and my husband 29. Never gave it a thought that he was 4 and a 1/2 years old than me. With him for 40 years until his death. You are worrying unnecessarily.

[ummmm]

I started going out with my daughters father when I was 17 and he was 27.

If it were my daughter I wouldn't mind if he was a nice bloke.

[murraymints]

waves to Carpy xx

[Mamyalynne]

I am a Mum of two daughters, they both dated boys/men of varying ages - age wasn't the factor in whether we liked them or not, the way they acted to them and to us was very important.

Both girls went on to marry men 12 years older than themselves similar to myself (my late husband was 10 years older than me).

[Samuraisan]

He's hardly an "older man" 5 years difference is quite normal I think. I bet your parents will be happy to know who you are hanging out with. I know we were when our daughter was 17.