Deep Sadness?

[lankeela]

The parents of a British schoolboy who was on the Air France plane that crashed in the Atlantic off Brazil have spoken of their "deep sadness" at the loss.

Deep sadness is what you feel when you hear of someone you knew dying - surely when your son is killed you would be absolutely devastated - but then he was shipped off to boarding school in England while the parents were in Rio.

[tamborine]

Different cultures use different expressions for same emotions.

[MWB]

Perhaps the parents are not the demonstrative types.

[Velvetee]

My partner's parents shipped him off to Boarding School, just around the corner from where they lived. I think if anything happened to him, his mother would also feel deep sadness, but would be devastated if something happened to one of her dogs.

[tamborine]

lol velvetee - what would you feel, heh heh

[Ice.Maiden]

Think it was just the way in which it was expressed at the time lankeela. I'm sure the boy's parents are devastated, but if you have the press wanting to nose around at times like that, perhaps it was just the quickest way to get rid of them. For all we know, perhaps a family spokesman stood on the doorstep and used the expression, or the press put it into their own words.

[Gromit]

Maybe parents are educated and do not have to resort to crass cliches to express their feelings.

Or perhaps they know the definition of 'devastated' and realise it is the wrong word to use?

Ah lankeela, I see where you are coming from now. The parents gave their child the best possible education they could, so it must be their fault he died in a freak accident.

[lankeela]

Or maybe they are just upper class twits who are unable or think it is unBritish to show any sort of emotion. And yes, I would be totally devastated if one of my dogs was killed.

[Gromit]

Which definition lankeela

Devastate:
1. to lay waste; render desolate: The invaders devastated the city.
2. To overwhelm; confound; stun

Do you not think that they feel 'deep sadness' is much better description of how they must feel than the two meanings above?

[Velvetee]

Well my problem with my partner's mother, is she would be more upset if one of her mangey Staffies died than if one of her sons did. That's what I call cold and inhumane. She's a nutter!

[jno]

the couple who committed suicide the other day with the dead bodyof their son were clearly devastated. (Are you sure you'd feel the same if your dog died? Would you kill yourself?) If the couple in this case do not feel suicidal, then they must be less than 'devastated'. Not everyone uses the same language or feels the same emotions as everyone else; perhaps we could respect that and not tell them what to feel.

[Velvetee]

I think she would Jno!

[lankeela]

Well I don't know which dictionary you had to resort to using but try this for size:


dev�as�tate [ d�vvə st�yt ] (past and past participle dev�as�tat�ed, present participle dev�as�tat�ing, 3rd person present singular dev�as�tates)


transitive verb

Definition:

1. damage severely: to cause severe or widespread damage to something
an area devastated by floods


2. upset enormously: to shock or upset somebody greatly
( often passive )

[tamborine]

you dont know these people lankeela.....respect their grief for heavens sake.

[NoMercy]

If one of my love ones were to die, I, too, would feel a deep sadness. However, if it were my mother or my grandmother (the two people in my life that I could simply not live without) I would be utterly inconsolable.

When a person speaks of their "deep sadness" or "deep sorrow", that is merely an expression of grief and is not indicative of their lack of feeling. Those are probably the words I would choose to describe my feeling for the majority of my friends and family, should I ever have the misfortune to lose them.

[Gromit]

lankeela

I use the Oxford English Dictionary or the Collins Concise Dictionary, neither of which have your definition.

You didn't get yours from a cr@ppy American one did you?

[Velvetee]

Well no one knows the true facts, but I'm sure the parents are overwhelmed with grief, sadness, devastation and possibly guilt that their son died without them in utter terror. No one can measure anyone elses grief or has the right to.

[trt]

I don't know why this family is being discussed on here in this manner, they have lost a child, let them grieve in private.

Just because he went to a private school, he is still a human being and no different from you or me.

Let it rest please.

[Quinlad]

This is one of the thickest posts for a while on AB. And that's saying something.

Splitting hairs over semantics because the parents didn't use the exact choice of word that you would have is really just idiotic.

[sqad617]

Quinlad....not quite the "thickest" but very close to it.

[Gromit]

lankeela

You appear to have a chip on your shoulder about people who are wealthier than you.

Without knowing these people you accuse them of being emotionally repressed, twits and the inference is that they didn't care or love this child because they sent him away to private school.

All of which may or may not be true, because neither you or I know these people and how they feel on the death of their child.

So what are we to make of you from this question?
Uncaring, insensative, and some other less polite words spring to mind.