Have You Had A Telephone Call From Wayne.?

[HansUrbancka]

This morning my wife answered the telephone and I heard her say to the caller, " Speak to my husband he understands things about Computers ."

Taking the call, I was informed ( by a male person with a strong sounding Indian accent) " I am Wayne and I am speaking to you from Windows Technical Section about a fault which you have on your Computer Equipment." However, he immediately terminated the call when I said "Are you able to give me an indication of which Computer is involved."

My wife knew it was a Scam Call and passed it to me because I can enjoy playing along a Scammer. Perhaps, I should have said something different.!!??

Hans.

Hans.

[grasscarp]

What like get lost (only less polite)?

[HansUrbancka]

@grasscarp.....I always endeavour to be polite. Although, I have been known to say "Please remove yourself by sexual intercourse."

Hans.

[chaptazbru2]

Did you press 'last caller' and get a number by any chance ?

[Mamyalynne]

I just ask Wayne to hold the line while I transfer him to our Technical Department - he seems to have to rush away at that point.

[Baldric]

"Go forth and multiply" is an alternative.

[gness]

Tell him, at length, about your mother's piles and corns.......☺

[Fusion5]

Yes I have encountered Indian Wayne. Same dialog problem with your computer. I said but I don't have a computer, so what now. He hung up.

[Fusion5]

When I get scam calls for Mr Fusion and I say he is not here, they always 'what time will he be in' to which I reply 'in about 15 years if he keeps his nose clean in prison'.

[sandyRoe]

Does he pick phone numbers at random knowing most people have a computer now?

[Fusion5]

My 95 year old Auntie got a call from Wayne, poor dear is a bit mutton jeff so the conversation was quite a long one lol lol

[maggiebee]

Think I may have spoken to Wayne. I asked him if it was the computer I used at work and if all the Government computers had a fault! Call ended rather quickly.

[HansUrbancka]

@chaptazbru2......No I did not get a number; only 'Caller has withheld number.'

I like your approach Mamyalynne.

The next time I get a call from a supposed Windows Wizard I think I will try and explain that I have a Micro-Soft problem which involves my Connection and that my ISP ( Interactive Service Provider) Viagara is proving to be somewhat useless in solving my problem. Very very slow upward speed which appears to be complicating downward results.

Hans.

[Peter Pedant]

Anyone had one from "Charleh" who sells coloured diamonds ?

For a full 21 days I said Mr P was out,
then shopping, then buyng me fish and chips
then at the library
#taking the dog for a walk

he broke before I did, and he insisted that he was calling from the Fraud Department of my bank - and which one is that ? Confidential said he

and then swore at me for ten minutes. Poor fellow.

[chaptazbru2]

I asked because there is an 00845 number doing the rounds nowadays who can sometimes be quite nasty. They plagued me for a few months some time ago, but seem to have stopped now. But obviously it wasn't them in your case.

[mikey4444]

I would have been tempted to string him along a bit...I'm sure you could have got another 10 mins of fun out of him if you tried Hans !

[murraymints]

I left Wayne listening to radio 3 for 10 mins...obviously did not enjoy the experience as he was gone when I returned fro my urgent business to attend to at front door...

[DTCwordfan]

" I am delighted that you have called - I've been looking for someone to clean the windows. We've got 68 of them and that should keep you pretty busy all day - how much did you say? You'll match our local Estonian, £5 an hour and one 15 minute break for a salmon and rabbit sandwich?"

[AlwaysConfused]

Mr AC answered the phone to a 'Wayne' one day. He asked in a high pitched, camp voice' Ooooh, Wayney. Did you phone me because of my double D boobies, or my double E piles? Oooh, lonely hearts is great'. To this day I don't know what was said on the other side, but I cried my eyes out, and had a stitch from laughter!

[Tuvok]

I haven't had one of these calls for a while.

Last time I told them "this is the fourth time you've called me. I don't have a computer"

Its true - I don't have A computer!