Etiquette

[retrocop]

Probably not the right place to post this but the only alternative would be CB. I am actually hoping for some helpful answers as a matter of curiosity. I am happy to have a some humour injected into the (hopefully) debate. Banter is great.
Don't let me lay down too many ground rules. I am the last to stifle a robust ,fiery debate. :-) should it happen.
QUESTION: Do ABers consider it bad manners and offensive at any time in their life to be addressed by their surname only?
I note on BBC and ITV news channels that political commentators will address ,to their anchorman, and call senior politicians in Government by their surnames. Blair,Cameron and Osbourne have all been addressed as such on TV without their titles of Prime Minister or Chancellor!!
I know that there are a good few men on this site who have served in the armed forces and other disciplined bodies.
Danny served his country just after the 2nd World conflict in the army for a good few years and then became a Police Sergeant. Baldric,Chill,Waterboatman,Mr aog,myself and my father plus many more men served their country.
Whilst at school I was always addressed by my teachers and masters by my surname only.When I left school and went into light engineering on the shop floor I was also addressed by the boss by my surname.I joined Hendon Police College,my father went to Peel House,and we were both addressed by our instructors and senior officers by our surnames. Men who join the armed forces are,as recruits,addressed by their surname by the "drill pigs" and RSMs etc.
My wife,as a young student nurse was addressed by Matron,
Sister or Senior staff as Nurse Whatever.
Did any men object to being addressed by their surnames and were any women on AB ever addressed only by their surnames in their employment perhaps many years ago. I believe a young schoolgirl may be addressed by her full name i.e. "Daisy Phillips please sit in the corner". What are your thoughts and experiences especially long in the past. Thanks.

[Jackdaw33]

Referring to someone by their surname is totally different to addressing them as such. No one would say Cameron That DOES bug me.when speaking to him but it is perfectly acceptable to refer to him as such. My problem is being addressed by my first name on meeting people for the first time.

[-SharonA-]

Retro, Mr A calls me by my maiden name most times and he says it is a term of endearment!!!

But I wouldn't like to be addressed by my surname solely by anybody else.

It may be ok in the forces, but not for me.

[Jackdaw33]

Slight errors here, That Does bug me should have come at the end. Hope you get the drift.

[weecalf]

It's some times considered a form of respect to be referred to as surname only as it suggest there's only one Presley Sinatra or Weecalf for instance

[Sqad]

Yes it would have been better in CB...;-)

Easy.....I call everybody by their surname unless they are family or that i know them well.

I would not object to a friend or family member calling me by my Christian name.....but never.....never....at work.

I hate patients being called by nursing or medical staff....as "Doris"," Billy"
"Luv".........that I consider disrespectful.

That's it.

[Baldric]

I was addressed by my Surname through Senior School ( I'm an Old Alfredian ) and through almost 20 years as a Royal Marine after that, never gave it a second thought.
You would surely have to be some sort of precious wuss to object too it.

[stuey]

As a child at school in England, I was always addressed by my Surname. When I arrived in Canada and went to school, I was really surprised to find the kids being addressed by their Christian names. You can call me by my Surname any old time; in fact, I prefer it. For some reason I really dislike being called by my Christian name by someone I barely know...By the way, are we still allowed to use the term "Christian name"?:)

[Jackdaw33]

Being referred to and addressed as are clean different things. My pupils used to refer to me (and other teachers) by surname but would not dream of addressing us as such.

[pixie374]

I agree with jackdaw. It seems very rude to me. Even your own examples show that it is just a way of keeping people "in their place". It's not appropriate in real life and especially ignorant when you already know someone dislikes it.

[Jackdaw33]

There is also a difference between addressing someone as X and Mr X.

[Cloverjo]

I wouldn't expect anyone nowadays to be addressed by their surname. Newspapers often refer to people by their surnames only, which sometimes jars with me. I'm used to PMs and presidents referred to by their surname, but it feels a little odd when reading an article about a normal person and their surname only is peppered throughout.

[Prudie]

As a female I've never ever been addressed by my surname only and I'd find it extremely rude if anyone did - does that make me a Fustie?

[ladyalex]

When I was at school, many moons ago, girls were always called by their first names, but from last year at primary until the end of their time at school, boys were always called by their surnames.
I cannot remember anyone being at all bothered by this.
I would not like to be called just by my surname, but if I was, say , in a service or profession where that was the norm, then I'd just suck it up.
I do not like being addressed by total strangers usually decades younger than me by my first name. I don't make a fuss about it ( unless they are particularly annoying) but if asked I always ask to be called Mrs ......
I worked with members of the public and would never have addressed them by their first names unless invited to.
I expect it is an age thing .Those of us who are older prefer more formal modes of address.

[Jackdaw33]

I always ask to be called Mrs ......

Don't you mean M'Lady or Your Grace?

[silliemillie]

I wouldn't be happy if someone called me by my surname only. If I'm asked my name I give my full name.

Although I am a widowed lady so officially a Mrs I never use the term Mrs or Ms as I find it strange that ladies are asked 'is that Ms or Mrs?' Men are not asked 'are you married' which is what asking Mrs/Ms/Miss is.

[ladyalex]

I only insist on Milady here on AB.

[Prudie]

Is this thread about being called Smith rather than Mr Smith or John rather than Mr Smith ?

[Jackdaw33]

Q What's your name?

A Smith

Q What's your first name?

A Mr.

[pixie374]

I think so, prudie. It's very different putting a title in front.

[Peter Pedant]

long question

do you mind being addressed by a surname ?

changes with time
school deffo
by university and the summer of luuurve 1970 christian names were usual altho surnames were used

at work - Mr and surname xc in private between equals

if some one shouts pedant !
I usually answer Sir !

I really object to mate pal and mushie...

There is a preoccupation not to call people sir in england
extend to the police
who cannot cope with the idea it means "unknown fella"

I have absolutely no difficulty with Miss or Ma'am for any unknown women including beggars and prostitues and hopeless drunks

I reflect on this often.

( the americans dont - - - mind calling an unknown man 'suh'

Very cultural and time dependent
Latvian apparently - your name is your surname
Vietnam six orders of reference - I was always an Ong by definition as I had a youngish adolescent in tow the whole time
My niece went up a grade whilst she was there ( young ado to older ado ) and admitted she didnt know what had caused it - perhaps because she had an ong glued to her
Russian POWs winkled my grandfathers name out of my father and then called him peter paulovitch

yes I am aware the man Hughes objects to being addressed so by AOG who lets fact it is a bit of an old git....