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Clinton's Presidential Campaign
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Hillary Clinton called Bill into her office one day and said, "Bill, I have a great idea! I know how we can win back middle America and secure my presidential victory."
"Great, but how so you propose we go about that", asked Bill? "Are we gonna have someone knock off Trump like we did Vince Foster?"
"No silly", Hillary responds, "we'll go down to a local Wal-Mart, get some cheezy clothes and shoes like most middle Americans wear, and then we'll stop at the pound and pick up a Labrador. When we look the part, we'll go to a nice old country bar somewhere in middle America and show them that we really enjoy the countryside, and show admiration and respect for the hard working people living there. It also means we take Colonel Sanders on in his backyard."
A few days later, all decked out and with the requisite Labrador at heel, they set off from New York in a westerly direction. Eventually they arrived at just the place they were looking for.
With the dog in tow, they walk into a bar. When they stepped up to the bar, the bartender takes a step back and says, "Aren't you Bill and Hillary Clinton?"
"Yes we are", says Hillary, "and what a lovely town you have here. We were just passing through and Bill suggested we stop and take in some local color."
They then order a couple of cocktails and proceed to drink them down, all the while, chatting up a storm with anyone who would listen.
All of a sudden... the bar room door opens and a grizzled old farmer comes in. He walks up to the Labrador, lifts its tail, and looks underneath, shrugs his shoulders and walks out the door.
A few moments later, in comes another old farmer... walks up to the dog, lifts its tail, looks underneath, scratches his head and then leaves the bar.
Over the course of the next hour or so, another four or five farmers came in, lifted the dog's tail, and went away looking puzzled.
Eventually Hillary and Bill could stand it no longer and called the bartender over.
"Tell me", says Hillary, "why did all those old farmers come in and look under the dog's tail like that? Is it some sort of cute old custom?"
"Good Lord no", said the bartender. "Its just that someone had told them there was a Labrador in this bar with two Asssholes!"
"Great, but how so you propose we go about that", asked Bill? "Are we gonna have someone knock off Trump like we did Vince Foster?"
"No silly", Hillary responds, "we'll go down to a local Wal-Mart, get some cheezy clothes and shoes like most middle Americans wear, and then we'll stop at the pound and pick up a Labrador. When we look the part, we'll go to a nice old country bar somewhere in middle America and show them that we really enjoy the countryside, and show admiration and respect for the hard working people living there. It also means we take Colonel Sanders on in his backyard."
A few days later, all decked out and with the requisite Labrador at heel, they set off from New York in a westerly direction. Eventually they arrived at just the place they were looking for.
With the dog in tow, they walk into a bar. When they stepped up to the bar, the bartender takes a step back and says, "Aren't you Bill and Hillary Clinton?"
"Yes we are", says Hillary, "and what a lovely town you have here. We were just passing through and Bill suggested we stop and take in some local color."
They then order a couple of cocktails and proceed to drink them down, all the while, chatting up a storm with anyone who would listen.
All of a sudden... the bar room door opens and a grizzled old farmer comes in. He walks up to the Labrador, lifts its tail, and looks underneath, shrugs his shoulders and walks out the door.
A few moments later, in comes another old farmer... walks up to the dog, lifts its tail, looks underneath, scratches his head and then leaves the bar.
Over the course of the next hour or so, another four or five farmers came in, lifted the dog's tail, and went away looking puzzled.
Eventually Hillary and Bill could stand it no longer and called the bartender over.
"Tell me", says Hillary, "why did all those old farmers come in and look under the dog's tail like that? Is it some sort of cute old custom?"
"Good Lord no", said the bartender. "Its just that someone had told them there was a Labrador in this bar with two Asssholes!"
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