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Ahhh, found out how to go about this one, all research into the New Jersey records have to be done in person and I've located the right town, right building, right records, right reel of microfilm , just need someone to go look at it for me now!
Oh and I now know that the SSDI only covers deaths from 1962 even though the system started in the 1930s.
I've used the rootsweb forum and they reply pretty quickly and there are a few users from across the pond that will do reciprical research and so fingers crossed!