I Was

[marval]

I was on my way home from work, when my partner rang me and said. ”On your way home, pick something up for tea.” So, I bought a kettle.

I was in a restaurant last night and the waiter asked me to cover his shift for sixty seconds. I thought; “Wait a minute.”

A teaspoon of mince, 3 kidney beans and 5 grains of rice. My mum made a mean chili con carne.

I am not impressed with these drawing pins I bought. It’s been two days now and they haven’t drawn a thing.

As I ironed my partner’s shirt, I thought. “This would have been much easier if he wasn’t wearing it.”

I entered the National Mopping Championship. I cleaned up.

I had a weird dream about a long slimy fish being knighted by the queen. It was Sir Eel.

I have just been down to the shops to get a new mouse mat. He keeps on trailing mud into the house every time he’s been out.

[goodgoalie]

Have you found Tim Vine's Joke Book?

[Patsy33]

Have you eaten something funny??

Lol!....

[marval]

I ate Tim Vine's joke book, must admit it did taste funny.

[maggiebee]

Some laugh out loud ones there marval, thanks.

[Georgiesmum]

Thanks for those. I particularly liked the kettle one.

[Shaglene]

Still brill.............