Surely It Can't Be True?

[DTCwordfan]

This is one third news, one third jokes, and one third CB......

Spotlight, our local news programme on the Beeb, has just reported that the main crematorium in Plymouth (Pasta-town) has been closed 'owing to a fire'......

this appeals to my sick sense of humour - any other examples out there??

[Mamyalynne]

It started New Years Eve, a lot of funerals have had to be cancelled and/or rearranged.

[theshedman]

The same thing happened a while back at the Margam Crem in Port Talbot. It was closed for a long time as I had relatives that had to go to a different one.

[237SJ]

We have a funeral director's near here called Wake and Paine. Always makes me smile when I pass there.

[DTCwordfan]

there's an undertaken in Ireland between Killarney and Kanturk. We drove past the establishment, an A-board outside, this proclaiming 'Graves Are Open'......

[pastafreak]

*pasta scrambles to find local news*

Eeeek!!

[ChillDoubt]

We have a local ice cream van that instead of having the obligatory ‘Mind that Child!’ sign emblazoned on the back has:
Don’t Skid On A Kid!

[pastafreak]

A quick look and I couldn't find that story.
But there's the one about a toddler getting his head stuck in a toilet seat...

https://www.plymouthherald.co.uk/news/plymouth-news/toddlers-head-gets-stuck-toilet-3701616

[Mamyalynne]

Pasta

https://www.plymouthherald.co.uk/news/plymouth-news/more-50-funerals-cancelled-after-3700334

[Buenchico]

Your post, DTC, reminds me of my uncle's funeral a couple of years ago. I found it hard not to burst out laughing when he was carted off to the crematorium to the sound of his favourite song: 'Smoke Gets In Your Eyes'.

;-)

[Patsy33]

Factory burnt to a crisp in S Wales 2012.
Real Crisps, was burnt down by 30 year old.
https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/colin-goulding-burnt-down-real-3006052

[Peter Pedant]

oh is this thread there where I can inform everyone
NW - the favoured candy is now - - - cinder toffee
and the cheapest house paint for redecoration for those that still have houses of course is - - Burnt Siena

[Peter Pedant]

yeh and at the swimming galas the ozzies love
the 100m free style is usually called - the swim for your life !

[roopower]

Reminds me of me and my big mouth! My father was rather eccentric, always wore a fisherman's smock or jumper and Jean's, beard etc. The only suit he ever owned was his demon suit. He could scrub up if he wanted but usually he didnt. When he died I went to see him at the undertakers. There he was pin tucked in white silk and I said " dad wouldn't be seen dead looking like that".....

[roopower]

He didnt wear Jean's, they were his own jeans.

[emmie]

there is a wine merchants that i came across called
Phil Glass and swiggot. not sure if that is correct spelling, but i did think it was funny.

[emmie]

a friend of my mums was being readied for cremation, the daughter wanted to put mementoes in the coffin
and decided on certain things, then said to the undertakers could she put in a bottle of gin as her mum was rather fond of the tipple. The undertaker said no it would explode in the coffin and cause a fire.
we thought that rather funny....