Continued - Does he like me? (2 - read the previsous one first)

[sueking1]

He was supposed to be off on friday, so i didnt think i'd see him, but he turned up to 'do a bit of work' - printed a few labels out! Now i know that he wouldnt have driven 40 mins just to do that, and i know for a fact the labels could have waited.... do you think he came in to see me as he knew most of the people were off yesterday? The only problem is - now i cant get him out of my head, he's got me thinking all sorts, especailly after our 'chat', which - at the time didnt mean anything to me. The guy in question is really lovely, but married and has a little girl who he dotes over - so nothing is going to come of it. But hes a friendly guy and always calls me gorgeous or sexy - but he has ever since i've known him, and its just his way of greeting me, and the other girls in the office, so its not something out of the norm. Its just that Thursdays chat and emails went further than normal - more personal - as we've never communicated about our personal lives like that before. I dont know if he was flirting with me and wants more, or if he was just being his same old horny self! What do you think? Guys - for a males point of view - whats he after / what does he want me to do - ignore it and put it down to a 'one off chat' or would he like me to show more of an interest for him? Dont worry, I'm not getting 'involved' i just want to know what his game is - i'd prefer to know and be prepare than to not be. Thanks all sue

[kissyfur]

Sounds to me like hes a married man who enjoys the excitement of some flirting, might like the ego boost that women still find him attractive.

[Bird Legs]

No matter how much this excites you and tempts you to take it further - just ignore any advances he makes and remind him he is supposed to be a family man!.... You may think that his attention is sincere and that you are powerless to stop it. Think again, so far as I am concerned, (and maybe a few others), it is YOU i would blame for breaking his little girl`s heart. These last few years I am astounded, disgusted, and filled with loathing at the number of little girls I know who are dismissed by the `doting` , `loving` who just cast them aside in favour of what you are doing.

[Minxie]

I was reading through your post(s) and noted you didnt put that he was married right at the beginning. That would of been the major factor here I would of thought.

Keep away from him. He is married and has a child.

[kissyfur]

It does sound to me like you are getting a bit envolved by the simple fact that you say you cant get this guy out of your head. Dangerous territory.

[sueking1]

Just to clear things up -
Married yes, but not happily. He dotes on his child, just like any parent would.....

Anyway, thanks for your help/comments, I'm staying away.

[888sally888]

Yep been there a million times 'I am married but not happy'. Tell him to take a hike - sounds like an unfaithful s*** who probably has a lovely wife.

Tell him to take himself in hand and find a good man - sounds like a sad loser.

[sue11]

Sounds to me like he is chasing you, perhaps as his next conquest? Is he known to have affairs? Or is he just a flirt that tries it on with any attractive female for an ego boost?
The obvious answer of course and is as you have been advised previously, is to steer clear, you certainly do not need to get involved with someone who you know is not free to return your feelings, not too mention of course the feelings of his wife and child.
I think from the sound of your post, you know this already, but just need the rest of us to back you up!
Cheers Sue

[DotH]

he is in danger of losing his job, if he carries on like this with other girls it only takes one psycho to shout rape or assault and his life in work and at home is over. Also, what he is doing is offensive, does it not register with you that this is unprofessional and will probably mean you will lose your job if you reject bhim and he has any say in your career? Ignore the sex issues, concentrate on your professional condust in the workplace and show him you are the more mature.

[sue11]

What Dot says is right, it is very easy to forget that you are working in a professional environment and get caught up in the excitement of the flirtation. Although this probably will not happen, all it could take is for someone to complain that your behaviour is causing them to feel uncomfortable or embarrased, especially if they overheard your conversation or caught sight of your emails!!
Cheers Sue

[sueking1]

Thanks Sue, your right, i already knew the answer, just wanted back up. thanks again, I appreciate your non-judgemental comments.

[sue11]

No worries, Sue! It is just that after reading Dot's advice, I suddenly remembered that when I went on a union reps course in my old job, we did a section on harrasement. We read about a sucessful case of harrasement that had been brought by an employee in response to the embarrasement that she had suffered, while having to listen to the flirtations of two of her fellow workers! This rang a bell with your question, which prompted my response!
Cheers
Sue

[samuel23]

From a guy's perspectivethe question has to be ~ Are you really that naive? If you continued with this, and it led somewhere (god forbid!) what would be your next step? Say he left his wife, if you got together with him would you EVER trust him? So the logic is , if he's thinking of being unfaithful to his wife, it means he's thought of himself and not the consequences for his child (so does he really dote on her - or is it all a charade?)

[samuel23]

From a guy's perspective the question has to be ~ Are you really that naive? If you continued with this, and it led somewhere (god forbid!) what would be your next step? Say he left his wife, if you got together with him would you EVER trust him? So the logic is , if he's thinking of being unfaithful to his wife, it means he's thought of himself and not the consequences for his child (so does he really dote on her - or is it all a charade?)