Funeral Arrangements

[MandyMooMoo]

If someone arranges their own funeral has full discussions with the funeral directors can the next of kin then go against these wishes? There are witnesses to the verbal wishes but nothing in writing and no will.

[barry1010]

Even if funeral wishes are written in a Will they are not legally binding and can be ignored by the family.  It is strange to think that the executors of the Will take ownership of the body but that is how it is regarded in law.

Sometimes there is just not enough money in the estate to pay for the sort of funeral the deceased wanted, other times religion or convention can play a big part.  The coroner could refuse to allow the planned cremation.

So yes, the executors can go against their wishes

[bednobs]

there is also a little bit of "he who pays the piper calls the tune"

my MIL was adamant she wanted to be buried as she was scared of cremation.  Everyone knew her wishes.

WHen she died, there was simply not enough money to do that (and her estate was insolvent) so we did what we could afford.  It wasn't burial!

[barry1010]

That's sad but understandable and not uncommon, bednobs.  We do the best we can

[MandyMooMoo]

Thank you for your responses. It makes sense why such wishes couldn't be legally binding. There is more than enough money so that's not the issue. 

[barry1010]

What is the issue? Is the next of kin also the executor?

[MandyMooMoo]

The issue is that he wants to spend eternity with the love of his life but his wife has other plans! They have been separated 20 years.

[barry1010]

Oh dear,  who is the executor?

[MandyMooMoo]

His daughter with wife no 1. She doesn't even like wife no 2 ( next of kin) and was very friendly with the love of life. 

[barry1010]

He needs to change his Will and make the 'love of his life' his executor.  The executors are the ones who make all the decisions re the funeral.

It doesn't need to cost anything.  He can copy his current his Will, changing the executors.  He just needs to make sure he signs it in front of two witnesses  and make sure it is dated correctly.

If he has his Will lodged with a solicitor or other Will service he should send the new Will to them.

That'll stop the argy bargy