Fostering

[jeanette1976]

I'm a 30 year old single woman and I'm desperate for a child but have not had a relationship for 4 years... down to choice. I have no idea about the fostering process or what it involves but I have been thinking about this for some years now and would like to find out more. I've also heard that it is possible to foster children over weekends but again, I have no idea what this involves or even how to go about finding out. I have lots of love and time to give and I'm a responsible, gentle and well-educated person.

Any advice would be very much appreciated. Many thanks.

[Pippa68]

Firstly, I commend you for thinking about fostering ~ there are many kids out there who need loving homes and aren't getting the support they need.

I imagine the weekend fostering you mention is respite care..this is when children stay with foster carers over a regular period of time in order to give their families a break from a stressful situation. The children may have very special needs...autism, severe ADHD, mental illnesses/disabilities etc. To take on this kind of responsibility takes a special kind of person...and to be able to invest your life into a child that you have to hand back time & time again must be incredibly hard.

I know of a foster mum who has been in the job for almost 40 years. She still fosters babies and children either long term or respite & has had so much joy & pain from doing so...she even adopted two children who were long term fostered.

The best thing to do would be to contact your local social services department. They will be able to tell you what it all entails, the pros & cons etc. I am sure they would love to hear from you!

Good luck :o)

[mycats]

Hi, can I just say I dont know how you go about becoming a foster parent but I went into foster care when I was 14 and it really turned my life around. I have great memories of living with her, she was single (a widow actually) and I will never forget what she did for me.
Good for you, I hope you find all the help you need

[babydust]

sperm donor? lots of single women are going down this route i think its a great idea

[angeldraws]

Firstly, the fact that you are 'desperate for a child' does not necessarily appeal to Social Services as an ideal attribute for a foster carer, but i'm sure there is much more to you as a person than that. It is much more important to put across what YOU can offer a child/children as a carer. Also, - and i'm not suggesting this as a general overview, just in MY experience in Social Services - many children are deprived, disadvantaged, delinquent and have many, many problems and issues arising from their lack of parenting/discipline, such as drug problems, extreme behaviour patterns etc. so you will need to demonstrate an understanding of this and of the patience you will no doubt require for such a position. You will be asked about your own upbringing and your thoughts on this and your intimate relationships/partnerships, and how you have dealt with issues etc.......it is a very in depth process. Any information you give about yourself/family will be checked out thoroughly. I realise that this sounds all doom and gloom its just best you are aware of the ins and outs and i dont know all of them but i'm sure you can understand why it is necessary, and on the other hand if you are not put off by any of this it can be a very rewarding role.
Hope this helps and good luck.

[Bellringer]

Start by offering your services to the local Brownies/Guides/Cubs and get used to the idea of loads of children & (perhaps) begin to see how their minds work. Good practice for if you do foster.