behavior changes

[tired nana]

My 4 y/o grandson is beginning to whine, use baby talk, talk back, curse, and act out in pre-school. Nothing is helping.

[noxlumos]

Best advice I can possibly give you ( father of 10) is to ignore completely any behaviour you do not like or want. This can sometimes take a very long time and it needs everyone to do it, but if you yell, tell off, punish or god forbid hit, then you are rewrding that negative behaviour with attention of some kind, so don't do it. Instead shower him with over attention whenever he does the slightest thing good and it will pass. No help now I know, but it does work if he won't be reasoned with.

[tired nana]

thanks, I told my son this might be the answer, but he is impatient.

[FlowerPetal]

Hi Nana,
i agree with Nox, but i would also add that when youre grandson does these things, speak to him in a mature way. tell him that you wont listen to him while he's talking like that and when he repeats himself in the baby speech, repeat yourself again. like Nox said, it does take patientence. Show him that he can be spoken to with respect and that you expect it back from him. Get his parents to have a chat with Pre-school and get them to do the same as you do at home IT IS REALLY IMPORTANT that where ever he is, the behaviour from the adults is he same.

good luck and most importantly, make sure you keep telling him he is valued and loved.
Flower xx

[hotmumma]

I have gone through the same thing with my son. I found that a reward chart helped. The tasks to accomplish were things like no whining, no bad words, helping mum, tidying up, going to bed, just really basic things to begin with. At the end of the week, see how many positive things have been achieved, then reward him. I found with my chart that if a tasked had been acomplished, then my son misbehaved, the task was crossed out and had to be achieved again. This made my son stop and think about what he had done. It took my son about 3 weeks to overcome his problem, but even though he is now behaving, we are carrying on the reward chart. As noxlumos said, ignore bad behaviour, as if he is getting attention for doing bad things, then he will carry on doing so. Reward good behaviour, and ignore the bad. I know it sounds cruel, but believe me, it works!!!

Good luck!!!