A Pirate walked into a bar
A pirate walked into a bar and the bartender said, "Hey, I haven't seen you
in a while. What happened? You look terrible."
"What do you mean?" said the pirate, "I feel fine."
"What about the wooden leg? You didn't have that before."
"Well, we were in a battle and I got hit with a cannon ball, but I'm fine
now."
"Well, ok, but what about that hook? "What happened to your hand?"
"We were in another battle. I boarded a ship and got into a sword fight.
My hand was cut off. I got fitted with a hook. I'm fine, really."
"What about that eye patch?"
"Oh, one day we were at sea and a flock of birds flew over. I looked up
and one of them pooped in my eye."
"You're kidding," said the bartender, "you couldn't lose an eye just from
some bird poop."
"You'd think so" replied the pirate, "but it was my first day with the
hook."
Cheers,