is there such a thing as ' a break'

[kdawg]

me and my girldfriend are having difficulty living apart in different countries (i'm a regular here looking for advice :) I think she might be looking for some time apart. To me this is a euphimism for 'breaking up' and as we're currently living in different countries whats the point ?

I'm i being unfair to think its 'all or nothing'and being foolhardy not give a break/time part a chance? I just can't see us havin time apart and then magically gettin back together in god knows when!

[MPsoldier]

Hey wow, i've been there...what you guys need is to sit down and talk this out face to face, and really look down the line 2-5 years from here and see where you guys see yourselfs at...then your decisions on where things should go and what should happen should take place

[Presario]

It does seem a little pointless to spend "time apart" when I'm guessing you spend most of your time apart as it is, living in different countries. I've never been in favour of "breaks". How can not speaking to or spending time with a person for a few weeks solve all your problems? I know it is probably difficult for you to sit with your girl and talk face to face, but you definitely need to talk! If it were me I would just ask, are we going to work at this? Or is it over?
I imagine other people will give you different advice, but there's mine :-) Good luck, I hope you work it out x

[LostStar]

There is nothing wrong with wanting all or nothing. I was the one who suggested my [previous] boyfriend and i had a break for a couple weeks because after being together three years and was unhappy, i needed to evaluate what i wanted compared to what i was getting. I think depending on peoples individual situation, depends on whether or not a break would be of any help. My boyfriend said (similar to you above) ''but when people have a 'break' they end up splitting up for good' and if this is the case then it would have happened anyway and if you end up realising you can't live without that person and miss them every second - then you've gained something positive - so it works both ways. For us, we got back together, he told me how much he missed me but didn't attempt to make an effort - i think that was the root of the problem in the first place and so giving it a chance i waited... then 2 weeks later i ended it, we weren't working and i was still unhappy. Maybe it softened the blow a little on his part for when we did finally split? You sound like you have already decided on what you want/expect from you relationship...Maybe it's already the end of the road and you want to break anyway? If its worth saving, you'll do all you can to get her back. Good luck whatever you choose.x