mother in law

[jordanb22]

I am 25 and lost my mom less than a year ago. I'm an only child and haven't seen my dad since I was 9. So, I feel like a 25 yr old orphan. I am engaged to a great guy and we have a 16 month old. He has a 5 1/2 year old from a previous relationship. I am pretty sure his mom hates me and I feel like she likes her other grandkids better because they aren't mine. Whats worse is that his mom, aunt, brothers fam and sisters fam all have his ex come over to cut their hair. I feel that his mom wishes he was still with her, it definately doesn't help that she's still so involved with his family for some reason. I feel like Iam not allowed to be myself around them and heaven forbid I tell his daughter to do or not to do someting even though she lives with us half the time. He has told me that hes a better dad because of me but I feel like the wicked stepmom around his family. I don't know what to do. I no longer have a family of my own and marrying into a family when youre not welcome is really not something I want to do. It's not like I still have my mom to talk to. Any advice?

[yummymum]

Firstly im sorry about your Mum but im sure she would think you are doing a great job without her, whenever you feel you need her just try to imagine what she would do in the situation and just do your best, she would be proud. His ex will always be in his familys life as she was once part of the family, put that to one side as its something you will never change and do try to just be yourself, you cant make people like you and the more you try the harder you will find it because people will see through you and see that you are not being yourself. His family will make their own minds up about you so the best thing you can do is be natural, it will make you happier and more relaxed and if they dont accept you then so be it, their loss. As for his daughter I would just treat her as you treat your own, if you feel you are being watched then try taking a step back whenever her dad is around it will take some of the pressure of you and give the family less to get at you for. Chin up!

[Paul_Rook]

I would concentrate on your relationship, then after a while you will be accepted they might have the hump now but it wont last, talk to your partner about how you feel and maybe come up with some ideas,it would be a shame to give up what you have just because the family ur marrying into dont like u that much? how can they not like you if they dont know u that well.