only children

[AutomaticGal]

anyone a only child out there???
i am..... is it just me or is being one simply horrible.
just gotta live with it i suppose. any advice?

[dot.hawkes]

my advice is, we are never happy with out lot, i have 2 sisters anmd a brother and we do not speak, we fell out before Mum died in 2000 and even my kids won;'t talk to my twin sister, count your blessings cos that is all we have.

[gina32]

my daughter is an only child and could always amuse herself if she was alone or get on well with people, i dont think it makes any difference if you have siblings or not, it is what you make it

[Pippa68]

There are many pros and cons to being a sibling and an only child.

Just live your life, it is the only one we have :o)

[mrs_overall]

As Pippa says, there are many pros and cons. I used to dream about being an only child as I am one of 10 kids. Console yourself that you will never have to put up with what I endured in childhood including sleeping 4 to a bed (and if someone wet the bed we all suffered), having permanent nits, and having hand me down clothes that weren't just 2nd hand but sometimes 7th or 8th hand! My school shirts were always grey instead of white due to their age and having had years of washing. The only time I ever kicked up a fuss was when I refused to wear an older brother's Y-fronts - remember this was in the age of mini skirts! I got a Saturday job at 13 and saved until I could afford my first ever pair of new shoes. Until then it was handmedown wellies in winter and handmedown plimsolls in summer.
Count your blessings!

[AutomaticGal]

i thank you for you advice. and in come cases that I have seen i am great full that I don't have to get hand me downs or get into petty fights on who gets top bunk. im 17 now im used to the silence. but what should anyone do in my scenario. My father is a security officer so he is never home after 5pm because thats how his shifts work. and to be honest me and my mother dont get on. whenever we have a row its that moment when i realise i dont have anyone to share my feelings with, anyone who knows what im going thru. i dont have anyone to talk to or a shoulder to cry on if thigs get worse. and being a british asian doesnt help either. i cant go out to see my friends or just to get away from it all, all i have is my empty room and a computer. you only realise that brotherly/sisterly love is extremely special when u dont have it. i see my friends and cousins all happy. brother buying sisters presents. sticking up for family when theres trouble. its how the saying goes u it is only once you realise something is important to you when u loose it. . ive never had it to begin with but i have countess examples around me. i honestly do envy those who do have brothers. . sisters. . God give you long and happy lives thats all i can say. i did say in the beginning that in some cases im greatful, but those bonds are more valuable to and outweight the cons. the question was. what would u do in my situation that i described above. .

[gina32]

i have 2 brothers and very rarely see them we hardly ever make contact, for whatever reason so having siblings isnt always as good as it seems it might be, be happy with your life and make the best of it

[mrs_overall]

I didn't realise fully what your situation was as your question was very short. First of all, you are an only child and there is nothing you can do about it. You seem to have a vision that if you had a sibling/siblings everything would be wonderful and you would have something to share things with. Unfortunately this is not often the case and in my experience siblings often fight and fall out. You may find this hard to believe but it's often lonelier being in a crowd than being on your own. You say you have friends and cousins - if you have a problem can't you confide in one of them? I have a couple of very good friends and if I have a problem or need a shoulder to cry on I would rather turn to them than my brothers or sisters. Siblings can judge you harshly whereas friends don't. I know your dad works nights but you must spend some time with him. Can you talk openly to him? If so, ask him to make the time. Are you at home all day or do you work or go to college? If so, make the most of that time when you have the company of others. At night you have your computer and could talk to your friends or cousins on line. Many teenagers don't get on with their mum but things will get better. My advice to you would be to think positive and don't spend your life wishing for things you can't have. Keep smiling!

[960cd]

Being an only child is great. I'm one and have always been pleased it's that way. There's always more money to go round because your parents only have to pay for one lot of Christmas presents, one birthday, one school uniform etc. etc. Only children are often better brought up as we have all our parents attention. All in all being an only child is fantastic!!!!

[slayer_fan]

yeah it really sucks, anyone who wishes they are an only child. proably isnt an only child

take care

[AutomaticGal]

true... the only real reason i posted a request for advice was because that day i was really down. that doest really happen that often. Thank God that i do have wonderful cousins, close friends and a loving BF. a am happy being an only child because of all those benefits all of you people have said. its only occasionally it gets to me properly, i guess that day was one of those. I really do thank you all for your advice, it has been so helpful get over my sad phase. i've finished college now and on my summer holidays. i'm planning to get a job soon so i can treat myself to a new hair do. lol . being an donly kid has ment i have become closer to my friend and people i wouldnt normally have done. and this summer is going to be great. my cousins from abroad are coming over and my exams are over!!!!!!!!!!

[aims1202]

Until i'd read the last bit you put on i was going to say it sounds like you're a bit depressed. Not sure now though as you sounded much happier in that last bit!
If you are depressed though then its probably not the fact you are an only child but that everything in your life seems bad. You could still feel like this even if you did have brothers and sisters. there are deffinately pros and cons to having them or not. i love my brothers very much and feel lucky to have them but i've felt like killing them a few times in my life!! Its very sad that there are people on here that dont speak to their brothers and sisters.
I have also been through very bad times and depression. so i know what its like. It does get better though and you can help yourself, like you said friends and cousins are just as important sometimes easier to talk to. try to sort things with your mum as thats one of the most important relationships in your life. if you cant talk to her then maybe write her a letter, telling her your feelings and that you understand hers. try not to blame her for you being an only child. i hope it all works out for you. youre young so enjoy life, have lots of fun, positive thinking works and remember life is what you make it!