Friends

[helliebobs]

Do you make friends easily? Do you have one best friend or several close friends? Are friends more important to you than family? Are your friends people you have known for years or recent acquaintances? Do you have friends for different purposes? What qualities do you look for in a friend? What qualities do you bring to a friendship? :)

[crossroads]

I have many friends all over the world. My friends all have their qualitys such as, tough, intelligent, funny, rich etc.
I don't look for friends, i just establish a relationship with people when i talk to them.
All my friends have been my friends for many years now.

[smudge]

I have lots of good friends who regularly keep in touch - some I've known since I was 5 years old! We have shared many happy times together over the years & still do.

Each & every one of them are different, but we all share the same closeness & have always been loyal to each other.

One friend in particular still makes me bread puddings & leaves them in my porch on her way to work, bless her.

I've never had to look for friendship, they've just warmed to me & it's gone on from there.

How about you helliebobs?

[helliebobs]

I've had loads of bad experiences with friends smudge so it takes me a while to trust people. I have a few close friends, some old and some new and a couple of my best friends are ones I have never met :)

[Lanesra]

I wouldn't say that i don't make friends easily but then I wouldn't say that I find it hard to make friends - I just find it hard to trust people enough to allow them to be my friend if you understand what I mean.
I have 2 best friends but for me to have lots of close friends it would take a very long time and I would most probably be hanging around with a big group of people - Which i don't.
I don't think friends are more important than family - but then it depends on how close you are to friends and family.
I have friends that i have known for years and others that i've just made friends with a few months ago. I've known my best friends for almost 7 years each.
I don't know why, but i am pretty sure that I may not be incontact with many of the friends i have now in a couple of years time. When i make friends i tend to think of how they would benefit me in life, how ambitious they are (in a good way), how open-minded they are and if we have anything in common. I can't stand people who are not willing to try new things and listen to others views. Furthermore, we cannot be complete opposites. I've almost finished secondary school and i think and hopefully i will make friends that i will keep for a long time when i go onto college & uni. I don't know why but i also judge people according to how they react to things, how knowledgeable they are, their body language etc. I want to have friends, like i said before, that will benefit me - whether it be for entertainment, consulting or just common interests. I want to have friends from all walks of life. That way i can learn from them and talk about many different things.
I like to think that I bring knowledge, happiness and meaning to a friendship as well as assistance - if you know what I mean. When i first meet someone i am normally quiet but after a while i'm back to my normal self - preaching my knowledge and expressing some of my slightly controversial views. :-D

[smudge]

I received an email from one of my friends yesterday & some of the words included:

Friends are like balloons; once you let them go, you can't get them back. So I'm gonna tie you to my heart so I never lose you.

Thought I'd just share that with you.

[smudge]

Loyalty & trust are very important in a friendship & if you haven't got that, then they're not true friends.

It's a shame you've had bad experiences helliebobs, but I'm sure your current friends are the 'real' ones.

Also, I think good friends are also the ones you might not see for a while, but when you meet up again, you can carry on from where you left off.

[raysparx1]

Hi heli, Hope you are well, friends can be more important than family, I know some of the members of my wifes family would no way be friends, a true friend will never let you down, they are with you through thick and thin, I have some great firends so I feel very lucky, I don't have to see them every week or even every year, but whenever i do nothing has changed, The qualities I think I have are honesty, trust and I am very faithfull and never let my friends and family down,one friend I have made in the last 18 months is Julie,she has been a great help to me and i trust her 100% and she knows that, and from what i know of you heli you would also be somebody that anybody would be proud to call a friend, take care, speak soon, Ray xx

[rugeleyboy]

my best mate got killed a few years back and i became a recluse at night time,i love to go to work but it's very rare is socialise in the evening unless its with my wife?, i have my family and other than that i keep people at arms length?

i dont need another best friend but i have lots of people who i call mates?.................... please dont pity me i like this in my life!!

[bigmamma]

Smudge , you brought a tear to my eye , thankyou for sharing your lovely words .I would think you would be a very loving loyal friend to have and your friends should never let you go. :-) x

[whiskeysheri]

Hiya, sweetie! :o)

I've always thought I do make friends pretty easily, but thinking back over it, I don't. There's always been a big group of people in my village that really dislike me and I've never known why. I could never ask, though, I'm really intimidated by them (not that I'd admit it!) and, to be honest, it's their loss- I'm a great friend to have, LOL! :o)

I haven't got loads and loads of friends, but I'm happy with my lot. The ones I do have mean the world to me and I couldn't be without them. I would definitely echo your last line down there ↓, too, hun (especially one person!).

Hope you're okay... x x x x x

[Rubyrose]

I took a friend from work to lunch today as it was her last day... we had a conversation about making new friends and she said to me 'You seem to make friends with everyone you meet. You make it look so easy'. That made me feel really nice but to me it doesn't seem like a hard task. I just talk to people.. even if I don't know them and sometimes we click and I have a new friend! I don't know. It's weird. I am in the perfect position though at work as I am on reception so I get to chat to everyone as well.

I have several close friends.. of all different ages. I am 23 in 2 weeks and I have friends from the age of 18 right through to 40's... My auntie and me get on like the best of friends and she is 55. (With the physical state of a 40yr old and the mental age of a 25yr old. Lol).
I wouldn't consider them more important than my family... but I also wouldn't say they come second!

Some of my friends I have known for years... my oldest friend has been my best mate since I was 13.. My male mate who I am close with has lived down my road since we were about 6yrs old but only in the last 3 yrs have we become close. Other friends I have only met recently at the job I have been at for a year. I suppose I do have friends for different purposes though... Some I know I can go and get drunk with.. some I can have a good cry with... Some I can be silly with all the time.. Some are simply people I can't live without.. They remind me of who I am.
I don't conciously (sp?) for qualities in a friend.. I go on my gut feeling and I guess if I find myself liking them and the friendship we form then it happens.. I don't know what qualities I bring... You'd have to ask my friends! Lol

[dot.hawkes]

arsenal, that was a well thought out and considered reply, even longer than slippers lol (didn't have the concentration span to read through either though) : ((

[EngTeach]

I have two "Best Friends": One since we were about 9 and the other since the first day of HS. The 3 of us are close. I find it easy to meet people as I will talk to the wall if it will listen. I have work friends, but am old enough to know that if I or they left the job we would gradually lose touch.
I agree with Lanesra about the placement in one's affections. There's really no way to rank family vs. friends. Though I think if I had my own children, hubby it might change. BTW both my BF hve been married for 14 years and have 2 kids ea. People are suprised that I have remained so close to them and they to me. On the surface we have nothing in common: I work full time, they stay home, I have no mate or children they do. Our education levels are vastly different, but we have a history and now I count their husbands as friends too. They had no choice, we came as a package.:)

[Rubyrose]

Thats nice Engteacher. :o)

Funny enough in my old job I was close to one person in particular and when I left, me and her kind of lost touch but I stayed in touch with 4 other girls, who I wasn't as close to when I worked there but now they are some of my closest friends!

I know it sounds stupid but I probably have about 14 close friends! (I just went down the contacts list on my mobile and counted all the close ones). I would however say I am close to them all in different ways... 2 of them are family members though and 2 are males!

[warpig3]

Hellibobs, I am not so sure you 'make' friends, in my case they 'happen'. I have never gone out of my way to deliberately make a friend but most of my close friends I have known for over twenty years and one for 35 years. I think the mark of a true friend is someone who is there for you through the good times and bad, also there are those who I may not speak to often but when we do speak it is like we have never been apart. I consider myself extremely lucky to have a few good friends and would do anything (if possible) for them. ~Whats that saying 'a friend will help you move but a good friend will help you move a body!'

[Goodsoulette]

I have 2 best friends. Lots of friends and a handful of close friends, maybe 15 of us. I have a couple old friends who I don't see from year to year but when we hook up its just like old times again.

I'm not very good with comforting people when they are upset ( I don't like touching or being touched much) and my best friends are pretty similar. I just like people I can laugh a lot with to be honest.

I did have a friend who had I hung about with since we were 3 but she let me down incredibly last year and I haven't been able to talk to her at all since. I was more hurt by her than the break up of my relationship. I honestly dont think ill ever forgive her.

[neo.]

I dont make friends easily
I only really have 2 friends now
One i have known for 10 years, was mate of mate. The other I worked with years ago and bumped into again 2 years ago when he was heading for divorce and wanted a social life again.
I am loyal and get my share of rounds in.