potty training

[tazz]

hi my little boys just turnt 3 yr old n i have been trying to get him to use his potty 4 ages now. i gave him treats 4 sitting on there in the past but none recently as i told him he gotta go wee on toilet. he`ll sit on there but never goes a wee. when he gets off the toilet he goes a wee. he seems scared to go a wee in his toilet.
has any1 else had this prob? what can i do? he starts nursery in sept n im worried he wont be able to go

[redcrx]

I am not potty training as such but I have been laying the foundations for it for months now with my son.
What i did was put the potty in the bathroom and sit him on it as I am running his bath in the eve. The sound of the water running made him go. Once he did he was praised and over a few months he will now wee every time he is put on the potty.
he does read books at times whilst hes sat on there just to keep him occupied but hes usually very good.
Im not sure how easy this would be with a 3 year old though. is his potty comfortable? would he be better off trying to wee straight into a big toilet and standing up?

[tazz]

yeah he got a potty thats like a mini toilet as he didnt like his norm potty. i tried him on big toilet to n he just cries. i will try the bath thing thou as he has one every night. thanx 4 your help.x

[confused79]

I have exact same problem, my step son who lives with me is 3 in october and he is a nightmare, he screams when sitting on the potty, i even brought him a musical one and he is scared of it, it seems he is scared of sitting on it. We have tried so much.
Its reassuring to know he is not the only one.
I have 3 sons of my own and there were all good at potty training and were all done by 2 1/2 and out of nappies during the day at least.
He has done about 2 or 3 wees on the potty now but not without crying although i am clapping him and prasing him, i know its worrying to think about getting him into nursery too.

[tazz]

nice to know im not alone confused79. mine will sit on there but when i tell him he gotts do a wee on there he screams at me n gets off. he is so scared of going a wee with no nappy on, its really worrying me now

[confused79]

I know what you mean, and it is worrying and annoying he goes to a childminder while im at work also and she seems to think he will in time, but seems ages away.
I also think he just feels more comfortable diong 'it' in his nappie, but i dont want him to feel comfortable doing that, it so hard, my partner has even tried taking him in the toilet eash time he needs to go to show him, but still doesn't work. I feel the health visitor is not much help either, they just say he will do it in his own time but when?

[confused79]

When he was sitting on the potty and i could tell he wanted to go he started going to wee and screamed and held his willie. and i was trying to stop him doing this, so he must think its wrong but i was prasing him still.

[tiny e.a]

We had this exact problem with my boyfriends son (I've been with his dad since he was 18 months and his dad is the sole carer so I've had a hand in raising him thus far). Like your son he would sit on the toilet but refuse to wee, then wee as soon as he was off. He didn't mind weeing in nappies, pants, on the floor...anywhere but the toilet. He was still in nappies until well after his third birthday, we had no choice because no matter how often we took him to the loo throughout the day he just would not use it. We got him pull ups and explained to him about saying when he needed a wee but all to no avail, aswell as taking him to the loo many times to see if he needed a wee, we would take him to sit on the loo after he had done a wee or a poo as we felt it was pure laziness and he had to realise that he couldn't escape actually sitting on the loo.

Like you I was very concerned about him going to nursery but by the time September came round he had started using the loo properly. He has ad too accidents at nursery wich I found embarrassing but it wasn't any big deal for the staff. He's now four and a half and has been accident free for many many months. I'm sorry this is not contructive advice but I just wanted to let you know it's not uncommon. I think children just develop different skills at different times, how ever much it may feel like it at the moment your son will not be in nappies forever. Try and relax so as not to make him anxious about going to the toilet and continue doing as you were doing he will catch on, or, as in my boyfriend's son's case, realise that it's more bother for him to take the l'azy' option (nappies) than it is for him just to use the loo.

Good luck!

[aims1202]

It sounds like he is anxious about the whole thing. This does happen more when they are a bit older as they develop more fears at 3/4yrs. But dont worry it will be ok!
Firstly put proper pants on him all the time. You need to be really relaxed about it all yourself and give him loads of extra attention and affection. When he sits on the potty praise him for doing so. Dont worry or say anything if he doesnt do anything in it. If he does it on the floor say, 'never mind next time you'll get it in the potty,' and thats it. If he does it in his pants leave them on for a few minutes, it'll be uncomfortable! Then when you change him again say, ' never mind next time you'll get it in the potty'. You can give him little reminders through the day that he can tell you if he needs to go or ask him if he wants to go, but dont ask too much.
Hopefully this will help him be less anxious about it and he will eventually do it in the potty. When he does praise him and give him a treat/prize every time. If he has an accident ,which he probably will, just be calm and say the same as before, its important not to get cross or annoyed and try not to say 'why didnt you ask me or tell me you needed a wee.'
Once he is ok doing it in the potty i would see if he'll go on the toilet, you could show him that you throw what he does down the toilet. he can flush the chain then try making the toilet more inviting let him have kandoo wipes next to it and maybe a seat. let him be involved in choosing all the stuff.
It might take a while so be patient and dont worry about doing it in a certain time like by september, just relax and he will too! Hope this helps you.

[Solarjunkie]

Can you borrow one of those caravan loos? It is a real loo, but smaller. My son stood in front of it & wee'd, just like dad.
That's another thing that can really help, demonstration! It's all very well to tell a kid to do something, but leading by example can be a great help.
Good luck.

[leewayne]

You can get these little balls from sainsburys that may help him,you put them in the toilet and he has to aim at them,that mite be fun??!! I said to my son when he was 2 and half that his nappies were tired and needed a rest so he should use big boys toilet now and that worked. or a reward chart everytime he goes loo?? that helped my boy,he was trained by 3 yrs old!!

[tazz]

i know what u mean confused79 my health visitor aint much cop either. they say just presist n it will happen, but when? its drivin me mad with the thought of not going to nursery as i know he`ll love it

[tazz]

thanx aimes i will try that i was thinkin about doing that but thought he mite get worse in some ways. now i know it is worth a go i will try it. all of your answers were very helpfull so thank u all, the balls seem worth a go if he does want to go on big toilet. thanx all.x