ChatterBank1 min ago
Please help!
38 Answers
I went home on Wednesday from work due to an accident at work, I was off on Thursday and Friday due to pregnancy related problems UNRELATED lol, feeling sick and more fainting etc..... I came into work today and my bos has been awful, told me he is very annoyed with me and that I'm being watched!!!!! (This is a relativly big company) He said that he is paying me to be here and I wasnt therefore he is losing patience! I sat there crying whilst he told me that he has been through this with his wife and knows what its like but I have to come to work...... After about 5 minutes of pure grilling and after I managed to stop crying for long enough, I told him that he was being insensitive to how I was feeling and that he hasnt been through what I feel like and that if he carried on I would leave the company. He asked me not to. I went to HR and put in a complaint and she was lovely, I have a meeting at 4pm with them both to discuss cutting my hours down a bit so I dont feel so tired. I'm just after a bit of advice, what things do I need to say at the meeting, what happens if he carries on being horrible to me and can they sack me whilst pregnant? I'm permanant and been working here since March....
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hey i worked all through my pregnancy but did have to take a few days off
Hey fact of life pregnancy can be really hard going on your body some people have no problems at all throughout then there are those who can be constantly uncomfortable in pain, being sick, piles, nose bleeds, swollen ankles etc etc etc give the girl a break her boss was well out of order and so are a few of you
Hey fact of life pregnancy can be really hard going on your body some people have no problems at all throughout then there are those who can be constantly uncomfortable in pain, being sick, piles, nose bleeds, swollen ankles etc etc etc give the girl a break her boss was well out of order and so are a few of you
ACAS is the Advisory, Conciliation and Arbitration Service.
They can advise you (and your employer) on the actions that can and cant be taken. You are entitled to take time off sick but your employer can insist (if you are long term sick) that you start maternity leave early but thats not until more than 20 weeks i think.
Try and email or call them for some advice.
Im fine by the way. still feeling very tired and sick but Im lucky enough to have nice bosses (me being one of them). Got first midwife appt thursday :)
They can advise you (and your employer) on the actions that can and cant be taken. You are entitled to take time off sick but your employer can insist (if you are long term sick) that you start maternity leave early but thats not until more than 20 weeks i think.
Try and email or call them for some advice.
Im fine by the way. still feeling very tired and sick but Im lucky enough to have nice bosses (me being one of them). Got first midwife appt thursday :)
Yeah its very rare I have time off and he knows I'm a hard worker or wouldnt have tried to get me not to resign today.
Put it this way, he has time off for much less!!!!
I told HR I felt I had been treated unfairly and that if I could have come in, I would have, I was passing out though and I didnt think he would really want me in as much as I didnt want to be there doing that!!!
Put it this way, he has time off for much less!!!!
I told HR I felt I had been treated unfairly and that if I could have come in, I would have, I was passing out though and I didnt think he would really want me in as much as I didnt want to be there doing that!!!
What really riles me is that employers have to be very careful what they say or do these days. You can have someone who is totally incompetent and let�s just say for example they are pregnant. If that boss tries a disciplinary then the discrimination is called - Can it not just be the case that some people are crap at their jobs anymore ?
sorry i forgot the link http://www.acas.co.uk/index.aspx?articleid=301
i worked throughout my pregnancy up until i was 2 weeks overdue, but i was a lucky one. Girly, if you feel ill then take a rest, you have to consider you and the baby before work. x
i worked throughout my pregnancy up until i was 2 weeks overdue, but i was a lucky one. Girly, if you feel ill then take a rest, you have to consider you and the baby before work. x
lol that ain;t whiffey and i guess smiffy is pretending to be whiffey now too, what a rottent hing to do to the girl when she is already feeling distressed.
Your boss is wrong and he cannot have that sort of conversation with , but you need to have the meeting with HR and tell them you do not want to take the matter further and an apology off him will do. he should back off then.
Your boss is wrong and he cannot have that sort of conversation with , but you need to have the meeting with HR and tell them you do not want to take the matter further and an apology off him will do. he should back off then.
Hi Dot, I dont even want an apology, I just dont want to feel like that again, I told HR I dont want to cause trouble, I wont go any further with it etc I just need to know If I'm passing out and being sick then my boss will be more understanding than he was.
Red glad you are feeling a bit better, very exciting the first appointment! I have my scan on 24th!!!! :O)
Red glad you are feeling a bit better, very exciting the first appointment! I have my scan on 24th!!!! :O)
Whiffey, it may annoy you but women still get sacked for being pregnant. My cousin was sacked from a well known hairdressers for being pregnant, with a letter stating that they felt she wouldn't be able to carry out her duties properly anymore. So she took them to court.
11 weeks, hang in their girly, the tiredness will get better within the next month.
11 weeks, hang in their girly, the tiredness will get better within the next month.
and yes, some people are just crap at their jobs and at time keeping and general working standards. As an employer i have experienced it many a time and 90% of that time it is young men that are failing to work to standard and are constantly (well 1 day a week for many) off sick. maybe its just the industry Im in though.
Don't encourage them.
I very much doubt that they'd behave like this if they were talking to someone like this face to face.
The anonymity of this site is making them brave and bringing out some really apalling bullying behaviour.
The word cowards springs to mind
Mind you it's a wonderful demonstration of why it's important to have legislation to protect the rights of women workers
I very much doubt that they'd behave like this if they were talking to someone like this face to face.
The anonymity of this site is making them brave and bringing out some really apalling bullying behaviour.
The word cowards springs to mind
Mind you it's a wonderful demonstration of why it's important to have legislation to protect the rights of women workers
round of applause for Jake *claps*
From my own experience, I was so worried about playing the pregnancy card, I did everything I shouldn't. I did everything the risk assessment said I wasn't allowed to. Mainly because it was things I would do at home but there were some things I did that I would have made my other half do. I think lots of women are aware from the chattering about them slacking off this that and the other behind their back that they just get on and do it.
I know another woman who I worked with didnt want to trouble anyone so she kept quiet when she was being sick and amost unable to breath. It was preeclampsia and she had to be hospitalised for the rest of her pregnancy.
Surely a little pandering does no one any harm? Whereas ignorance can.
From my own experience, I was so worried about playing the pregnancy card, I did everything I shouldn't. I did everything the risk assessment said I wasn't allowed to. Mainly because it was things I would do at home but there were some things I did that I would have made my other half do. I think lots of women are aware from the chattering about them slacking off this that and the other behind their back that they just get on and do it.
I know another woman who I worked with didnt want to trouble anyone so she kept quiet when she was being sick and amost unable to breath. It was preeclampsia and she had to be hospitalised for the rest of her pregnancy.
Surely a little pandering does no one any harm? Whereas ignorance can.
HR will tell you where you stand regarding sickness. IN my job you self-certify for a week and then you need a Doc's certificate. Maybe he was angry because you didn't phone in sick or make it clear why you were away? In your absence he will always assume the worst. Communication is the key. Ask HR about this.
Regarding his attitude, I think he needs to be taught a few lessons in people management. Honestly what a horrible man. SO glad you complained about him!!
Good luck and let us know how you get on.
Regarding his attitude, I think he needs to be taught a few lessons in people management. Honestly what a horrible man. SO glad you complained about him!!
Good luck and let us know how you get on.
Unless your boss is always like this, it is possible that he is feeling the strain of your absence. I am not saying that he acted or reacted in an understandable way, just that he might have been unusually insensitive due to pressures on him, and the sudden realisation that a member of his team is not able to be as reliable as previously taken for granted.
It is difficult to deal with, and it sounds as though he either has little experience of managing people and expectations, or is being bullied/harangued from above. It is good that you are discussing this with your HR dept, as he clearly needs to be reminded of his duties and responsibilities as a line manager. Nonetheless, you need to tread very carefully and do your job as best you can, as any shortfall would substantiate proceedings for dismissal. Whilst you wish him to understand your situation, perhaps you might also take time to appreciate his.
It is difficult to deal with, and it sounds as though he either has little experience of managing people and expectations, or is being bullied/harangued from above. It is good that you are discussing this with your HR dept, as he clearly needs to be reminded of his duties and responsibilities as a line manager. Nonetheless, you need to tread very carefully and do your job as best you can, as any shortfall would substantiate proceedings for dismissal. Whilst you wish him to understand your situation, perhaps you might also take time to appreciate his.
People have 3wks off cos they have had the flu.Some people sail through pregnancy others dont.Im with Amy on this one -I was determined to prove that I would'nt use pregnancy as an excuse and humphed boxes the lot just to prove it -stupid erse that I was.
I agree BTW- I dont think thats Whiffey posting.
Sad fact is -if us women didnt soldier on,put up with the s hit that girly has put up with then half the boys on here wouldnt be here to put their tuppence worth in.
U stick in there girly and if you do have the delight of a wee boy (I mean that - I have one -although he's a big boy now) -heres hoping you'll not bring him up with the archaic views of some of the said 'male' species.
All the best hun -it does get better xxx
I agree BTW- I dont think thats Whiffey posting.
Sad fact is -if us women didnt soldier on,put up with the s hit that girly has put up with then half the boys on here wouldnt be here to put their tuppence worth in.
U stick in there girly and if you do have the delight of a wee boy (I mean that - I have one -although he's a big boy now) -heres hoping you'll not bring him up with the archaic views of some of the said 'male' species.
All the best hun -it does get better xxx
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