ChatterBank1 min ago
FWB or more?
9 Answers
We've been friends for over a year, and I consider him one of my best friends. After about 6 months, we started sleeping with each other. We've never discussed what it is we are, but now its been almost a year since we've actually been sleeping together and I'm confused. We don't JUST sleep together. We go out and do things, concerts, dinner, movies. We even have lunch once a week during his work break.
In front of his friends, he'll hold my hand or kiss me, rub my back, etc. In the car, he'll ALWAYS put his hand on my leg while he's driving ( I know it's lame but its only something boyfriends have done.)
We'll spend entire weekends together, and just cuddle all day. We text EVERY single day, literally not one day passes where we don't talk, and because of that I'm almost positive he isn't seeing other people. What does it mean when he'll often say "my princess" in these texts?
He'll wrap his arms around me all night, and doesn't let go, even kissing me before we go to sleep and if I stay over while he works, he'll kiss me before he leaves for work.
He'll even text me as soon as he drops me off (yes he takes me home), and we'll end up texting all day as usual.
What I don't know is how many other girls he's seeing, though I doubt there are any because I spend almost every weekend, all weekend with him.
Well have told each other we love each other, but only sporadically, and I'm sure we only meant it as friends, though it took him a long time to say it :-P
I'm very afraid of bringing any of this up to him, because I'm not quite sure if I want a relationship either, so I don't wanna drive him away by asking for a title. I just need peace of mind.
As far as the paying- he usually does. I try to fight him for it and sometimes I pay, otherwise he always offers.
In front of his friends, he'll hold my hand or kiss me, rub my back, etc. In the car, he'll ALWAYS put his hand on my leg while he's driving ( I know it's lame but its only something boyfriends have done.)
We'll spend entire weekends together, and just cuddle all day. We text EVERY single day, literally not one day passes where we don't talk, and because of that I'm almost positive he isn't seeing other people. What does it mean when he'll often say "my princess" in these texts?
He'll wrap his arms around me all night, and doesn't let go, even kissing me before we go to sleep and if I stay over while he works, he'll kiss me before he leaves for work.
He'll even text me as soon as he drops me off (yes he takes me home), and we'll end up texting all day as usual.
What I don't know is how many other girls he's seeing, though I doubt there are any because I spend almost every weekend, all weekend with him.
Well have told each other we love each other, but only sporadically, and I'm sure we only meant it as friends, though it took him a long time to say it :-P
I'm very afraid of bringing any of this up to him, because I'm not quite sure if I want a relationship either, so I don't wanna drive him away by asking for a title. I just need peace of mind.
As far as the paying- he usually does. I try to fight him for it and sometimes I pay, otherwise he always offers.
Answers
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it sounds to me like your self stigmatising what you have. If you take a moment, step outside of yourself and look in you are pretty much in a relationship, the only difference between your relationships and most other peoples is
A-you were extremly good friends beforehand
B- There was no "asking out", it just simply happened and you just let it develop
I think its not being in a relationship your afraid of, your simply scared of the word "relationship"
if you were in a relationship how would life differ IN ANY WAY to life as it is now???
it sounds to me like your bloke is a decent guy and from my experience decent blokes are in extremely short supply.
Let us now how you get on. I will be more than happy to advise you further
LOT
A-you were extremly good friends beforehand
B- There was no "asking out", it just simply happened and you just let it develop
I think its not being in a relationship your afraid of, your simply scared of the word "relationship"
if you were in a relationship how would life differ IN ANY WAY to life as it is now???
it sounds to me like your bloke is a decent guy and from my experience decent blokes are in extremely short supply.
Let us now how you get on. I will be more than happy to advise you further
LOT
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Amelia, you have doubts...you're insecure and you have every reason to be so.
You want more than what you have. So you have to ask yourself what is it you really want?
A ring?
A steady b/f? (the knowledge that he's faithful to you)
You want some form of commitment from him but if you don't get it are you willing to lose him?
That is the ultimate question.
If you're happy to go on this way, so be it.
If not, you need to roll the dice
Come right out and ask him.
You want more than what you have. So you have to ask yourself what is it you really want?
A ring?
A steady b/f? (the knowledge that he's faithful to you)
You want some form of commitment from him but if you don't get it are you willing to lose him?
That is the ultimate question.
If you're happy to go on this way, so be it.
If not, you need to roll the dice
Come right out and ask him.
Best friends make the very best lovers.
Sounds to me like this guy is totally smitten by you. I suspect he hopes it is obvious you are in a relationship together. How much do you love him? If you do love him a lot then go and tell him as soon as you can. Say how you realise you have not discussed the nature of your relationship and you want him to know how much he means to you.
Could be that he doesn't want to pressure you either and would be absolutely over the moon if you told him. Think back to who has taken the relationship further in the past. Have you always waited for him to arrange the next step.
Why might you not want a relationship? Are you just telling yourself this to protect yourself in case he isn't looking for committment? You sound more like you would be devestated if you lost him. Be honest with yourself.
But if you think you may be able to do better by looking around then you are probably heading for a very big disappointment. This guy is a rare gem by your description. He took a long time to say he loved you it is because he doesn't take such a statement lightly. Some people will say it without meaning much by it. To him it might even imply a statement of relationship.
Great relationships are about great communication. Take a little chance and tell him how you feel. You don't have to ask for a title. Don't even ask him to say what it means to him of explain expectations. Just stick to telling him honestly about your feelings for him. My bet is he will weep with joy.
Sounds to me like this guy is totally smitten by you. I suspect he hopes it is obvious you are in a relationship together. How much do you love him? If you do love him a lot then go and tell him as soon as you can. Say how you realise you have not discussed the nature of your relationship and you want him to know how much he means to you.
Could be that he doesn't want to pressure you either and would be absolutely over the moon if you told him. Think back to who has taken the relationship further in the past. Have you always waited for him to arrange the next step.
Why might you not want a relationship? Are you just telling yourself this to protect yourself in case he isn't looking for committment? You sound more like you would be devestated if you lost him. Be honest with yourself.
But if you think you may be able to do better by looking around then you are probably heading for a very big disappointment. This guy is a rare gem by your description. He took a long time to say he loved you it is because he doesn't take such a statement lightly. Some people will say it without meaning much by it. To him it might even imply a statement of relationship.
Great relationships are about great communication. Take a little chance and tell him how you feel. You don't have to ask for a title. Don't even ask him to say what it means to him of explain expectations. Just stick to telling him honestly about your feelings for him. My bet is he will weep with joy.
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