dont you think sometimes it would be nice to talk common sense to some one

[shanx]

without this he said , i said you said , everyone blaming each other , sad world we live in full of bitter people , who complain about there lives and dont care about anyone except themselves , if they were told tomorrow they had a week to live ,because its about them their outlook would change

[Ice.Maiden]

Agree with Angel - you're not feeble at all - xx.

[shanx]

you will find the strength dris i know you will ,when i lost someone close my mother when i was young<< my aunt who i loved said keep your pecker up ( took it she meant my nose )but i did it worked < so i am passing the advice on to you from my lovely aunt

[Ice.Maiden]

It's sometimes easier said than done when you're feeling desolate, but wise words from your aunt, Shanx. You don't forget these things, but time DOES heal. I've been surrounded by people close to me dying, and other awful situations, but it serves to make your own life, and those of your remaining loved ones, very precious. x

[Drisgirl]

Thanks both of you -strangely enough I have never vicalised this but I feel responsible for Daves death cos if we were still together he would still be alove.Think R in particular as he's older is kinda balming me.

I said to Dave when we first were married that I kept having a recurring thought that he would die young -it was that bad that I told my family cos it haunted me -Dave just laughed and said thank eff for that cos I dont want to end up like my old man.When R told me (no-on could get me on my mobile that dayt) that his dad had been killed I was on my knees - even when my sis and R came to get me all I could say was I knew he would die young -im sorry to everyone but its early days for everyone and the only place I have is here although I did phone CRUSE and felt better for it.

Know what -thank you all for letting me let my bfeelings out cos I can swear that it doesnt get easier with tim -well not 4 months.Maybe in 4 years I might be able to speak or post without being maudling -it gets worse before it gets better -I am struggling badly ATM and its only the fact i can come on here and have a detached life which keeps me going so thanks to all the kind peope who are always there for me and for the erses who get on my t!ts -lol

[Ice.Maiden]

Four months is nothing yet sweetheart - so let it all out when you feel down. I also don't think that things would've been any different if you'd still been together, but because i don't know your story properly, it's not really for me to make suggestions. Just be brave - there are always people on here who'll listen to you - xx.

[Drisgirl]

Thanks Ice for that -I know it but its just too tough to digest ATM -i'll get there -just too raw just now xx

[shanx]

time heals <but slowly take everyday as it comes xx

[Petal~flower]

Drisgirl, I have read your posts about your loosing your ex husband. And have felt your grief on here. You are still grieving, as its so early still, and you have your children as constant reminders of him. I am really not very good posting replies on here. But just wanted to say, take each day, one day at a time. I have lost 2 friends due to road accidents. They were not family members, but it still took me a long time to get over it, as it was a sudden death. And not something you are prepared for, if you understand what I mean, if someone has along illness. You know what will be.

I hope you can get some help from a bereavement counsellor. Which I think is what you could do with.

Like I said, I am useless at replying xx

.

[Ice.Maiden]

I think Petal's made a fab effort in trying to convey her feelings- and those of everyone else. It's true - everytime you look at your children, you'll have that reminder there, but when we grieve, we go through a whole spectrum of emotions - from sadness, to guilt, to "if only". Nothing can undo the path which life has in store for us, and as Shanx said a minute ago, time DOES heal. It just doesn't seem that way at the moment. xxx

[Drisgirl]

Petal thanks you have hit the nail on the head -I am worse now than I was 4 months ago -because the kids are now feeling worse now and they are my achiles heel.
It will getter better -I know this -thanks xx
IM -Thank you -you are so right -its so painful but we have to get there -albeit with our lives altered forever and a day......................

[leelapops]

Wow so much sadness :(

shanx, in answer to your original question, people's shallowness beggars belief sometimes, yes. It breaks my heart that people can be so self-centred when all around, there's so many that need someone else to listen. It's a huge cliche, but some people don't know what they've got 'til it's gone (good old Joni!)
Also, though, I do get warm and fuzzy glow when I see acts of kindness, or see on here when people rally round to support others. I just wish I saw more of it, and less of the hatred, anger and sheer vitriol in everyday life.

Sounds naive, but why can't people just be nice?!

Dris, I think others have said it so much better than I can, but I am, as before, so sorry for your loss. I won't pretend I can imagine what you're going through, but I am in a way glad you choose to use AB as an outlet for your grief. Stay strong sweety, you've come so far already.

Petal your reply was really heartfelt.

angel, am I to understand you lost a child? That is so sad :( I am sorry. xx

[raysparx1]

Hello all, missed your post last night Dris, I do remember you saying about it, I can't add to what the others have said sometimes I wonder why the hell I come on this site, then something like this question comes up and gets such great replies I know why I keep coming on here, Keep going Dris one day at the time, it gets easier, but if you want to cry then do it if you want to swear than do it aim it at me I don't mind just never bottle it up, same with you angel Think you are all really lovely people, thanks for restoring my belief that there are more nice ones than idiots xx

[Drisgirl]

Thanks so much leela and Ray -just got really maudling last night again.Thing is when I post it all coming tumbling out -i'm sorry to everyone who must think I should be over it and that i'm being a pain -sometimes think this keyboard should come with a breathalyser lol-however it helps me immensely to let it out so to speak on here xx

shanx -I am so sorry I kinda hi-jacked your thread and I didnt even acknowledge what you were saying to me -I must have had tunnel vision -thank you for being so kind xx
In answer to you original Q -I agree 100% -I have changed totally (not that I was bad -complacent tho).I cant be ar$ed annoyed with people who are vindictive and hurt others without a second thought -just for a laugh.Well its not bloody funny and people should remember that even although this is 'cyber' world-it still hurts like heel when someone has a pop at you -just as in real life.Hope youre OK xx