The Bloke On Who Wants To Be A...
Film, Media & TV0 min ago
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yes and no imo. I think being hurt is a natural reponse because you feel that your bf fabrication reflected badly on you. However he was not thinking of this, but only his shame at being poor. Understand his point of view and it will stop hurting. I would also question yourself about whether it was the fabrication itself or the way in which you perceive your bf mates to regard you now.
You have a legitimate complaint that he misrepresented the situation. However, try to see the mitigating circumstances, although perhaps him not saying anything to his mates would have been more sensible than an outright lie.
Have your say, then move on. It's the sort of incident that can crop up time and time again, and take on an importance far greater than it should. That is to be avoided if possible.
It would be decent of millie to pay back to the boyfriend any contributions (if any) he'd made toward the holiday he didn't go on.
Other than that, it isn't her fault that he couldn't go at the last minute. You'd have thought he'd have located/safeguarded his passport more than two days before travel. It wasn't fair for him to have misrepresented the truth to his mates, showing millie in a bad light.
I really think you are overreacting quite badly here. He was trying to save face in front of his mates and wasn't lying to you. After what you just said he feels ashamed about it so can't you just let it lie? Blokes don't think about things like this the way women do, an off the cuff comment made by a guy in the pub is not thought of in the same way by men and women and you have to realise that.
From what you say I don't think he blamed anything on you as Pootle suggests and I agree with EI D in that surley him missing out on the holiday and spending time away with his girlfriend of 3 years is more than enough punishment for losing his passport and a face saving comment to his mates. Especially if everyone now knows he lied about it.
Pootle, I personally agree that your earlier comments were immature and that your suggestion of punishment by postcard as just spiteful and childish. Yes it is stupid to lose your passport but it has happened to thousands and thousands of people in the past and it will continue to happen in the future, it's one of those things.
You don't have to appoint blame, ridicule and humiliation to everyones little mistakes in life and if you think that you do then I think you very sad and could end up very lonely!
Easy people. We are talking about a dozey chap who lost his passport and tried to keep a bit of bravado in front of his mates, at the expense of his gf.
So he has come out in the open and admitted everything and felt humiliated and ashamed in front of you and his mates.
Isn't that enough now? Oh no, of course, there is all the other little lies that your female antennae has honed in on, because now he is just a big fat liar and can't be trusted at all can he.....
Milly - now you do know him better. We all lie, to get on a high horse about it is in 99.9% of cases hypocritical. In this case he didn;t break a trust with you so I would let it go. If my girlfriend was to blame me for something to her friends, I would not be that bothered. they are her friends, not mine, if my girlfriend feels the need to lie about something, I would trust her judgement. Im not perfect, neither is my girlfriend - luckily neither of us pretends to be and trust regarding important things is rock steady. Isnt that what relationships are about?
Pootle, no of course not, however I feel your point of view is just that, so why would I not say it?