Writing "thank you" notes

[blackcat77]

I would be interested to hear other peoples' opinions on this. I have always been encouraged to write thank you notes for birthday and christmas presents, not only because I think that it is good manners but also if you are sending money or vouchers it is nice to know that they have arrived safely. If not a note, even a phone call would be nice. My OH's children who are all married with their own children very seldom do this and frankly it bugs me! I tried suggesting to him to ask them nicely if they could just let us know if the gift has arrived but he told me that I was being snobbish! Am I? Are good manners snobby?

[poohshunny]

I too was brought up to write thank you notes. I have always done this and now make sure my son does the same. We are Scottish and now live in England, so in this age of technology, I often take a photo of my son with the gift he is thanking someone for. This way, it is even more personal and the extended family can keep up to date with my son's progress, especially as he seems to grow up so quickly!

[mumof3angels]

I was brought up to write thankyou letters, and consequently my children have been brought up to do the same. In fact, instead of writing long hand each and every note they now sit at the computer and design their own thankyou notes in bright colours and text , basically just saying thanks for the gift, print a load off and sign them by hand. They have more fun doing it and the notes look really good. However, mrmumof3 has a very large family and we never get a single thankyou back from any of our nephews and nieces not even a phonecall or text!! Considering most of them are above the age of 12 you'd think they could be bothered.

[blackcat77]

I'm very glad that I have had so many positive answers on this topic. It quite restores my belief that so many people are instilling good manners into their children because it does seem that there are a great many children growing up with very little guidance from their parents and if they are not set a good example how can they be expected to learn?

Thank you all.

[WoWo]

It's never been done in our family, however thats basically because we have never sent gifts through the post they are always given in person.

It's definitely bad manners not to say thank you, however personally it wouldn't bother me in the slightest if somebody didn't bother to write, I don't give out presents gifts based on the thanks I'll receive, thats just my opinion and it's clear people here think different.

[rachael88]

i am 20 years old and since i was a small child i always phoned up to say thank you
to me a thank you means alot to me

hope it helped xxxxx

[Prangy]

so let me get this straight....

You send a present as a nice though yet you always expect a response?

And then if you dont get a response, you all of a sudden stop giving gifts?

You are just as bad if thats the case. Tit for tat, cat on the doormat.

[rachael88]

i rather give than recieve so i will still give if i do not get a thank you that is not how it works with me xxx