help i want to keep my baby

[sharkie]

my boyfriend has booked an appointment for me to have an abortion tommorrow morning. I dont want to have it as the baby was planned and i want to keep her / him, He wont leave me if I keep the baby but he says it will ruin his life. I am so unhappy that I have agreed to have the abortion but I don't want to. Please help :-(

[Jo20082008]

It seems like you are making a decision about having an abortion or not, depending on what your boyfriend decides or how he behaves. The most important issue here is YOU your health and how you would feel if you were forced to do something you didnt want to do. I was once in a similar position and very young and I had an abortion although I felt sad when it was all being planned it was only words not actions. The worst part was after I had it done, I felt so guilty and lonely and could not get over it and I hated my boyfriend afterwards as I realised that I would have had more love keeping the baby than I would ever of had with him. Also anyone who pressures you to do something like that is NOT worth being with anyway, although you cant see that now as its all just words at the moment. You must follow your heart and do what you truly want without fear of losing your boyfriend. Remember if you decide not to have the abortion you will never be alone xxx

[lil123]

PLEASE please please do what you feel is right. What ever you decide to do you will have to live with for the rest of your life.
I was going to have a termination with my son but on the day I couldn't do it. He is a smashing little lad and I am bringing him up on my own. I have never been happier.
Men come and go, but your children are there forever. xx

[china38]

He is petrofied - he does want it, just very very scared, its normal ;) but, if you both DIDNT want the kid - why not use the pill, coil, condom etc...

[Nkakamasembe]

go on have the baby! if he does a runner bon voyageur or what ever.

[helena2207]

Hi sharkie,

So sorry to hear of your dilemma, If you want this baby keep it, otherwise you will regret it for the rest of your life and I can assure if you your relationship will suffer, you won't be together, because if you do have the operation it will be your partner that you will blame and a relationship do not survive on blames. I've had to have two terminations, my was life threatening because of my gynae problems but believe me I still regret it and I will do so for the rest of my life, because the registrar gave me the options of staying in the hospital and rest until full time, i was only 11 weeks pregnant then, but i had my 7 months old baby to think of , he was already born prematurely and only had 50% chance of survival. I know my situations is a vast difference from yours, but think carefully before you go ahead with this termination, your partner obviously still immature he is not ready for fatherhood, but you are, go for what your mind, body and soul tells you, only YOU can answer this question and whatever answer you get go with it. perhaps if you do go ahead and have the baby and when your partner see his child he would probably be happy that you went through with the pregnancy, it appear to me he is very scare, men are always scared of pregnancy so it's not a new thing.

anyway think carefully and think of what you want and do not feel guilty what ever decision you choose.


Best of luck


helena