can i leave home?

[smr17]

I'm 17yrs. old with a baby. i am still with baby's father,but my mom refuses to let him come and see the baby because she dislikes him. i want for the baby to be with his father can i live with him and her not say any thing?

[devilwoman]

of course u are old enough to leave home, but beware, once you do you'll have all the expesne to pay, like
food
gas and elecrtricity
rent or mortgage
telephone bills
plus you'll have to do all your own washing, shopping ect.
plus you wont have a baby sitter on tap either,
get the picture? dont be in such a hurry to leave your mothers house, believe me you've got it easy where u are.
why dont u visit your partner during the day with baby then sleep at mums?
hope this is a genuine question, if irt is, good luck to you and think carefully about what you are abouit to lose.

hope you're not russian, or a les.

[ummmm]

Oh my God devilwoman. I think we are all starting to get paranoid now!

smr17....You can live with him without her consent. As devilwoman said though it might not be a good move!

[ummmm]

Actually devilwoman....I take that back

Didn't pay enough attention to the name!

[redcrx]

devilwoman, the russian admitted to not being pregnant, although that doesnt usually mean much.

smr, of course you can leave home. But its far from an easy life with a youngster and all the bills to pay. Do you work? what about childcare whilst you work? If you dont work, how will you cover the bills?

Plus as devilwoman said, lifes a lot easier when theres someone to advise (like your mum) and help when needed. How good is the babys father with parenting? is there a reason why you do not already live with him and share responsibility?

[moominmonsta]

I will be 17 when i have my Baby and i am still with the father. I feel so sorry for you and i hope everything works out!!
I don't think your mum can leagally stop you on the grounds that she doesn't like your Boyfriend. My mum was the same and i just sat down with her and told her that i understood that she didnt want me to leave home but that i felt i needed to do it for me, It will be hard for you but you will feel a hundered times better with your boyfriend by your side. Good luck xx

[ConfusedMum]

devilwoman hit the nail on the head. unless of course you are pretty well off then go for it or if you have a fair bit in savings.

live at your mums and just visit your bf when you can - maybe your mum will come around if she sees he is taking on his role as a father responsibly? it's so common these days for lads to up and leave especially young lads, i'm sure your mum is only trying to protect you and stop you from getting hurt. although deffinitly going the wrong way about it.

i'm only 18 and i wouldn't dream of moving out of my nans yet - for the reason devilwoman posted - the cost of living alone is ridiculas - especially if you are wanting to stay at home with your lil one and be a full time mum.

if you trust the father to look after the baby well then why not get him to look after the baby? you get some you time and he gets some alone time with his lil one. your mum can't ever stop him from seeing his baby - so there's no reason you can't meet up somewhere or go to his house is there?

good luck with what ever you do kids are hard work aint they?! haha

xxx

[smr17]

i appreciate ya'll for answering my question. while i've bin here with my mother i've basically taken care of myself. i feed myself and do my own laundry pay my own phone bill and anything else that i need i have my boyfriend. he works and buys pretty much everything that me and or the baby need. my mom isn't going to change her mind about my bf any time soon and i'll be 18 in a month. i have money saved up in my account as well as my bf . as far as childcare my bf's mom is able to watch him while me or my bf go to work.
so...after hearing the rest of my side do ya'll still feel the same about my first question?

[kylie1988]

Hey smr17. I see your point and I understand. I can see why a lot of people may think that you might struggle at your age with your partner. Only you can decide whether you and your partners relationship is strong enough to be living together with your baby. If your financial situation is stable and you feel that you can do it, do it. I am sure your mum will always be there for you anyway. It would be nice however if you could leave on good terms with your mum. It is rather rare for couples to get along with there in laws. Your not the only person who suffers with this issue. So dont worry. I dont think it will last long. My mum found it hard to get along with my partner. I have now moved out and engaged. My partner and my mum are like bestfriends now. You will be surprised how things change. It just might take your mum longer to see that your partner wont hurt you and he means well for both you and the baby. I hope this helps.