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trouble16 | 18:36 Sat 14th May 2005 | People & Places
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 o.k youve kown a gal for a while and you like her and you think she likes you, would you txt her bk near enough instantly, or would u wait a while?(hour or so). even after roughly an 8 month friendship?

And if ur mate said he was going on holiday with a gal who he says "were just mates", would you believe him that nothing was going on, that he wasnt telling you? 

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Not a guy speaking but thought I'd put my point of view just as an interested party. 

 a)  do you tell your mate everything? Have you asked him about this gal you like? Maybe you do confide in him and expect him to reciprocate.  However, you have to allow that not all guys want to speak about 'their' stuff,  in fact guys are well-known for keeping too buttoned-up, usually!    I was reading an article recently about celibacy being the new thing among some men, either just because they don't feel like being too free with their favours or because they are fairly serious about a girlfriend and want to see how it develops.  He might no longer feel satisfied with casual dates and wants a friend of the opposite sex, who he can talk with in a different way to you and other guys.   There might be some other reason he doesn't want to tell you.  What would be your reaction if you thought he was serious - would you laugh at him or try to put him off? And why do you want to know?  Are you going to tease him and spoil it for him?  He might think you would.

b)  I am not sure if you are on the level here?  If you are talking straight, i.e. not some hidden 'guy speak' ... anyway, I think you need to get on with things after 8 months of friendship, before someone else tells her straight out that he likes her.  Maybe you feel it's uncool to reveal your feelings;  remember 'he who hesitates....'   Or if you are shy, remember 'faint heart never won fair lady...'

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o.k something very strange as just happend. what i wrote in my question wasnt't whats above these answers! it has been changed. its actually a guy that i like, and im perfectly straight! ahhh! god my morning as been so bad this far, imagine what might happen in the rest of the day!

but thanx for the advise!

I would think that anything more than half an hour waiting for a text response is annoying.
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you wouldnt believe how annoying it is. sometimes he would take hours on end, theres no point in having a phone if you dont use it and answer your calls or txts! do u reply bk to txts almost instantly, give or take 20 min (max)?????????

x

I must admit i used to text back straight away and found it annoying when my girlfriend wouldnt reply for ages. Its just because some people are more layed back than others and honeslty dont realise they are annoying other people. I sometimes think people do it to seem like your not the only person in their life, as if they are busy with other things.

I now take a little while to text back, especially if it's to the opposite sex it doesn't make you look desperate that way even if you have time to text them back.

You can't go on holiday with just two people of opposite sex's as 'just friends' sorry but it's true, there is always something more if it's just two people.

You can't go on holiday with just two people of opposite sex's as 'just friends' sorry but it's true, there is always something more if it's just two people.

Years ago, I had a good friend who lived in another state (about a six hour drive away), but we saw each other about twice a year attending conventions for a club we belonged to.  We also took a holiday through England and Scotland for two weeks one year.  We always shared a room, but he never made a move towards me.  I always wondered if I was that repulsive physically, or if he was gay.  He eventually married a girl (I was invited to the wedding, and he danced the first dance with me and not his bride...!), and also sent me a postcard from his honeymoon.  So I never fully figured him out, and never thought of a way to outright ask him "what's your deal?"




 

That certainly alters things!  I thought it was funny that a bloke would be so interested in what his mate(bloke) would be up to on hols.  Your guy going on hol. with a girl:   would be unusual  to say the least, but Oiusch's post is an example of a no hanky-panky situation.  Perhaps these guys are looking for a sister figure.?

re: the texting.  Some messages take a long time to get through, but you can see after 8 months that delays in answers are deliberate.  Maybe he is of the 'treat 'em mean, keep 'em keen' sort?  Perhaps you too should have other friends.  I wonder if the guys agree with me, that all they want is peace (i.e. to be left alone by women, most of the time)?

Sorry to get hold of the wrong end of the stick. Hope tomorrow's better!

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