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My husband is still in contact with his ex-wife

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Laurinha | 15:46 Thu 22nd Oct 2009 | Relationships & Dating
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Hi,

I was just looking for others opinions on my situation please.
My husband was previously married for eight years. His actual divorce decree came through around the end of August. I met him in March, the divorce process had already begun. We got married in September.

My husband and his ex-wife have two dogs. They live with her but he sees them once a month or so.

The thing is, my husband and his ex email each other now and again and have begun texting each other.
He tells me there is absolutely nothing going on and has even given me his phone to read some of the messages, I am not sure if I am alright with them texting each other like this, I mean should my husband really be sharing an intimate relationship with another woman? Intimate in the sense that they have a personal relationship together which is all but completely private from me.

Any opinions are appreciated.

Lx
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Just wanted to clarify - cazzz1975 - he collects the dogs from her house and brings them to stay with us for the weekend.

Lx
Although they are no longer a couple, they're still family in a way - you wouldn't expect him to stop all contact with sisters, female cousins etc would you? I know it's different in that they've had a physical relationship, but that's all over now and they still have a lot of history together. If he was seeing her behind your back then I could see your point for worrying but he's being perfectly open with you about it. If you make a huge fuss about it then he's more likely to start hiding it from you so as not to upset you, and that can only lead to problems as he'll feel he has to keep secrets from you, leading to a less than honest relationship. Lighten up and accept it for what it is - a friendship. I lost my best friend of 20 years because his new wife didn't like him having a female friend. We've not spoken for over 2 years and I miss him every day, and I can only imagine that he may come to resent her for making him give up such an old friendship for her when she had no reason to worry or be suspicous.
If you tell him how much it bothers you he should end the contact with her. I think.
Actually I tend to agree with Flobadob. I actually wouldn't like it if it were my husband although I would happily have the dogs over. But the texting each other regularly - no!!!
Trust is one of the most important areas of a relationship. Jealousy kills it, and so from another person who only knew their husband for 6 months before we were married, I'd advise you to accept that it's you that your husband loves, and be happy that you have a friendly caring man. If he's done nothing to warrant this distrust, then take a step back and show him how much you respect and love him.

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