I want a baby but he doesn't

[Nay35]

I have been with my boyfriend a year and 4 months and I fell pregnant back in September, I found out when he was in Hawaii with his mates. I told him when he got back and he said he didn't want it. After a lot of discussions we decided for me to have an abortion, which now I regret, but it was the wrong time because he is studying to be a tax accountant and the baby wouldve been due right around the time of his exams. Since then it has been on my mind lately and we have had many arguments about it cos he keeps saying he doesn't want kids for the foreseable future. He is 28 in April and I turn 35 this year and feel that my bodyclock is ticking. I have a huge decision to make, do I stay with him knowing that I will probably not have any more kids or do I ask him to leave and hope to find someone else. I do love my boyfriend more than life which makes this descision so difficult.

[cherrychapstick]

no contraception is 100% though and he should wear protection just incase ,hopefully in time and soon he will want to be a father it could be he thinks it is too soon due to the fact its only been a year and 4 months

[Nay35]

You could be right about him thinking it is to early in our relationship but our relationship is the longest he has had so far.

[cherrychapstick]

that could be another reason then maybe he is scared that it will end like his other relationships and trying to be sensible he might not want to have you being a single mum with his child ,he sounds like he does have his head screwed on tbh he sounds as though he is insecure ,i wouldn't usually condone what he asked you to do but i do see where he might be coming from i also see where you are coming from think this will be the hardest decision you will ever make i do hope you make the right one and once you decide don't think of the what ifs ,i will put something to you though if you stay with the man you love you may never have another child ,if you don't stay and try to find another man who you have to make sure you love you may get the same is it worth the risk you have a 7 year old son i may be tempted if i was in your shoes to be thankful for what i have xx but you have to make that decision on what is going to be best in the long term for the happiness of you and your son

[cazzz1975]

a year and 4 months is still a very short time, whatever you do dont get pregnant by deliberatly missing a pill or whatever, you may wind up a single parent.

he may need more time for you both to be a couple first as you have not been together very long yet.

[4getmenot]

so he would blame you if you got pregnant as you should have taken the pill. This is just it he is the one that doesnt want children!! So he should wear a condom!

[maplestar]

You don't want to have any regrets later in life. I agree with what someone said about if he had the ability to pressure you into an abortion then he will not be a suitable father, but who am I to judge? - You say he is a brilliant father to your child now. If you really want another child - then no matter how much love he can give you that will never be enough. I have seen it happen with a couple were very happy together for 10 years, she fell pregnant and desparately wanted the child, the baby was born and the couple broke up as the dad just wasn't ready. you can't put an age on being ready for being a parent. In time he may change his mind, he may not. Imagine 10/15 years from now would you rather be a [potentially] single mum with two children, or still in love with a man who loves you and your only child... Good luck.x