Hello Sailor

[McMouse]

On joining his new ship a RN officer was interviewed by the Captain. The Captain said "I expect my officers to be firm and fair when dealing with the men and handing out punishment. If you are in any doubt don't hesitate to seek advice from me."

A few weeks passed and the officer dealt with a number of minor disciplinery matters - drunkeness, late on duty, insolence etc. for which he doled out suitable fines and loss of privileges. One day the Master-at-Arms reported to him that a sailor was caught given blow jobs to his ship mates. This was completely outside the experience of the officer so he sought guidance from the Captain.

"you expect me to be fair Sir, so what do you advise I give this man?"

The Captain replied........."£15-20 quid sounds about right"

[piggynose]

oh no not another semen joke

[crisgal]

when i heard it, it was a trainee priest doing his first confession:

'psst ... what do you give for a ***?'
'two packets of ringos and a mars bar'

mind you, you couldn't tell a joke like that these days ;)